the dreamer v2.0 (calinewarkwc69) wrote in ohnotheydidnt,
the dreamer v2.0

ONTD Original: ASTROLOGY POST! Do the stars know why ONTD hates Ariana?

Post after post, we rag on her: Is she a diva? Does she hate her fans? Will she ever change her hairstyle? Will she ever stop the Lolita schtick? Will we ever understand what she is singing? OR, can she rise above a rocky start and fulfill her prophecy in becoming the new generation’s Mariah?

Let’s start with the obvious; girl is a Cancer! And there is a reason that Cancer is the crab, and it’s not only because they’re crabby, but because they’re “hard on the outside, soft on the inside.” Cancer is the first water sign of the zodiac, so it’s where we first discover that we have emotions. It’s also a cardinal sign, meaning “self-starting” so when you put it together, it makes sense that Cancers are so moody because they’re “self-starting emotions” every time something happens to them! The problem here is that as a water sign, Cancer is also deeply sensitive and easily hurt, and as a result, they build up a very thick wall, or “shell” if you will, to protect themselves. When a Cancer is upset with you though, it’s pretty obvious. They’re not fans of confrontation at all, but when they’re hurt, they do like a crab and burrow into the sand to be left alone. I’m fairly sure a Cancer invented the silent treatment as well. Don’t get it twisted though, Cancers are deeply protective and loyal to those close to them and often have a huge blind spot in seeing the flaws their loved ones have. They’re much more likely (if not guaranteed) to protect and defend their family and friends than they are to stand up for themselves, and when they do, you better beware, because Cancer has a signature snapping claw that snaps shut with their special snark. Cancers are very special though, they are the “mothers” of the zodiac, who seek to nurture and take care of our emotional health. They have a loony sense of humor, love a good cry, are very sentimental and never forget a kindness, and as one of the two money signs (Taurus is the other), they find their emotional security is linked to their financial security. Nothing fucks with Cancer more than the thought of not having a house (they rule over the home), or being able to indulge when the craving calls!

Other Solar Cancers ONTD has a problem with: Tom Cruise, Selena Gomez, Gisele Bundchen, Lindsay Lohan, Nicole Scherzinger, Courtney Love, George W. Bush, Lizzie Borden, Jared Padalecki, OJ Simpson

Solar Cancers we love: Tom Hanks, Kristen Bell, Princess Diana, Jessica Simpson (or at least I hope so), Solange Knowles, Diane Kruger, Benedict Cumberbatch

Just a little piece of your heart....Collapse )

Sources & StuffCollapse )

I'd like to dedicate this post to our hard working Ariana stans. Here's to the cause!
Tags: ariana grande, astrology

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