Madonna's life has been an open book for just about 30 years now. But in a cover story essay for the November issue of Harper's Bazaar, the pop legend, now 55, revisits an old trauma some fans may have forgotten about: Shortly after arriving in New York City as a scrappy unknown from Rochester, Mich. with enormous dreams of stardom, the singer was a victim of rape."New York wasn't everything I thought it would be. It did not welcome me with open arms. The first year, I was held up at gunpoint. Raped on the roof of a building I was dragged up to with a knife in my back," writes Madonna, who adds that she "had my apartment broken into three times. I don't know why; I had nothing of value after they took my radio the first time."As Madonna acolytes know, back in 1978, the future megastar dropped out of the University of Michigan, where she had a dance scholarship, to move to the Big Apple.Arriving in New York, she says, "wasn't anything I prepared for," she writes. "Trying to be a professional dancer, paying my rent by posing nude for art classes, staring at people staring at me naked. Daring them to think of me as anything but a form they were trying to capture with their pencils and charcoal," she continues. (Some of those nudes later made their way into Playboy magazine after Madonna became a star.) "I was defiant. Hell-bent on surviving. On making it. But it was hard and it was lonely, and I had to dare myself every day to keep going."