ohnotheydidnt

The "Fifty Shades of Grey" book trilogy by E.L. James is currently reigning over the New York Times Best Sellers list, taking up the top three slots. The movie rights have already been snatched up by Universal Pictures and Focus Features, so it was only a matter of time before we started thinking about casting the books' main characters for the big screen.





Armie Hammer as Christian Grey (LOL NO!)

Copper hair, strong build, steely gray eyes ... Armie Hammer would make the perfect Christian Grey. He's 25, just the right age to pull off 27-year-old Grey's air of success and boyish charm, and he can go from serious and sexy smirk in a second.
Backups: Ryan Gosling, Michael Fassbender, Chris Pine, Henry Cavill



Elizabeth Olsen as Anastasia Steele

Olsen breakout role in "Martha Marcy May Marlene" proved she can play frightened and confused like a pro. But it's her piercing blue (her eyes are green thou) eyes that seal the deal -- darken her hair a few shades, and she is not-so-innocent recent college grad Ana.
Backups: Dakota Fanning, Saoirse Ronan, Alexis Bledel, Emma Stone



Evan Rachel Wood as Kate Kavanagh

Ana's inquisitive roommate Kate has strawberry blonde hair and a fierce attitude. Wood often plays older than her 24 years, but would make a believable mature recent college grad with sex appeal.
Backups: Carey Mulligan, Mia Wasikowska, Blake Lively, Ari Graynor



Michael Trevino as Jose Rodriguez

Young photographer and college student Jose adores Ana and desperately wants to be more than just friends, but the arrival of Christian Grey solidifies his place as a pal. "The Vampire Diaries'" Trevino has proven he can play tortured, and his good looks make him a nice threat for Mr. Grey.
Backups: Taylor Lautner, Penn Badgley (where did this come from), Mark Salling



Michael Keaton as Ray Steele

Ana's stepdad Ray is ex-military and likes the simpler things in life, like baseball and fishing, but he's got a soft spot for his little girl. Ray's role isn't huge, but Keaton could easily pull off playing the reserved, protective pop.
Backups: Ed Harris, Bryan Cranston, Jeffrey Dean Morgan



Mary Steenburgen as Carla

Ana's mom Carla is a hopeless romantic, but also fairly unlucky in love. Ray was her second husband who Ana stayed to live with when she ran off with #3. Now on #4, she's hoping her daughter won't make the same mistakes.
Backups: Patricia Clarkson, Marcia Gay Harden, Teri Hatcher



Jimmy Smits as Jose Rodriguez Sr.

Jose's dad and Ana's dad Ray were old army buddies, reunited when their kids became friends at college. Jose Sr. also desperately wants Ana and his son to get together, and Smits can play convincing in his sleep.
Backups: Danny Trejo (lol like he would ever), Edward James Olmos



Susan Sullivan as Grace Trevelyan-Grey

Christian's mother Grace -- a pediatrician who adopted him at the age of 4 -- is smart, sweet and very high society. Sullivan's poise would be perfect, but it's her ability to play sadness and fierce maternal instincts that would come in handy.
Backups: Susan Sarandon, Joan Allen



Stellan Skarsgard as Carrick Grey

Carrick is a successful lawyer and businessman who makes his family's best interests a top priority. He's soft spoken, but still has presence -- Skarsgard's soulful eyes would definitely come in handy for the more emotional moments.
Backups: Harrison Ford, Victor Garber



James Franco as Elliot Grey

Christian's older adopted brother, Elliot, is a good time guy and a real ladies man -- Franco could pull off both -- who's always giving his little brother a hard time for his single status ... until Christian meets Ana.
Backups: James Marsden, Zach Gilford



Lucy Hale as Mia Grey

Christian's little sister Mia has always been the only woman who can give him a hard time and get away with it. Lucy Hale could play the energetic brunette in a second.
Backups: Leighton Meester, Emmy Rossum, Nina Dobrev



Christopher Meloni as Taylor

Christian Grey's most trusted security man, Taylor is ex-FBI and the strong, silent type ... but he reserves a smile here and there for Ana.
Backups: David Morse, Bruce Willis



Helen Mirren as Mrs. Jones

Christian's housekeeper Mrs. Jones is also a mother figure of sorts, keeping his swanky penthouse home tidy, cooking all meals and keeping the refrigerator stocked with his favorites.
Backups: Cybill Shepherd, Jane Seymour, Julie Andrews



Sharon Stone as Elena

Christian's Mrs. Robinson -- the woman who welcomed him into the kinky world of BDSM at a very young age -- needs to be a predator, but still sexy in her older age. Sharon Stone fits the bill.
Backups: Ellen Barkin, Meg Ryan, Morgan Fairchild



Colin Firth as Dr. Flynn

Dr. Flynn is the voice of reason in Christian's life, and they have more than just a therapist-patient relationship. Flynn is a confidant and charming in his own right.
Backups: Clive Owen, Ralph Fiennes, Guy Pearce, Robert Downey Jr.


I know people are tired of this book but this list was so lulzy I couldn't resist. And lol @ Huffington Post making a fancast for this piece of shit. /have to laugh to keep from crying.

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