Kris Jenner’s Sexual Arousal Oil for Old Ladies
Do you have a dry vagina?
Kris Jenner has the solution for you.
Busy week in the Kardashian sex news business.
Yesterday, we learned that Khloe Kardashian installed a sex swing, which collapsed under the weight of her fucking giant NBA husband Lamar Odom.
Today, we learn that Kardashian matriarch Kris Jenner has been named Zestra® Essential Arousal Oils™.
What, you ask, are Zestra® Essential Arousal Oils™? Hit it, euphemism-laden press release:
In a signed letter on Zestra's website, Kris recommends using the oily substance to "keep feeding the fire and keep monotony out of monogamy."
( More under the cut...Collapse )
Kris Jenner has the solution for you.
Busy week in the Kardashian sex news business.
Yesterday, we learned that Khloe Kardashian installed a sex swing, which collapsed under the weight of her fucking giant NBA husband Lamar Odom.
Today, we learn that Kardashian matriarch Kris Jenner has been named Zestra® Essential Arousal Oils™.
What, you ask, are Zestra® Essential Arousal Oils™? Hit it, euphemism-laden press release:
Zestra is a topically-applied, over-the-counter product from Semprae Laboratories, Inc., that is clinically proven to enhance women's sexual pleasure. Jenner, a 56-year old mother of six and wife of Olympic Gold Medalist Bruce Jenner, is a savvy entrepreneur who has helped build successful brands for herself and her daughters.
In a signed letter on Zestra's website, Kris recommends using the oily substance to "keep feeding the fire and keep monotony out of monogamy."
the face
It's not that I have an issue with the product or the need for it, which is great. I love the idea of people getting their freak on, even into their 80's. It's more who the spokesperson is. lol
yuck
My cousin grew up to be this tall, dynamite piece of fine ass and my aunt completely changed. A once seemingly normal Stepford wife, she started creating fake online profiles using her daughter's picture, going into chatrooms, submitting her "portfolio" for modeling jobs, and even went as far as having phone sex with some of these people... then she would turn around and coerce my cousin into meeting them for the gigs! My uncle was like: "Uh, I don't know you, bitch. Please sign (hands over divorce papers)."
/csb bitches be crazy
Edited at 2012-02-10 04:01 am (UTC)
i had been working with her for two weeks. TWO WEEKS
she later went to al-anon because the same boyfriend is an alcoholic and proceeded to tell me all of the people she saw there. she clearly missed the anonymous part. so glad to be rid of her.
I mean OUCH.
about the vadge oil
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Edited at 2012-02-10 08:53 am (UTC)
Poor Montana...
tho i've never been w/ anyone so no comments as of yet lol
I get mentally aroused very quickly but my body ALWAYS gets there first by some margin and it's quite disconcerting. Like my man will start touching my arm and for a few seconds I'll still be mulling over the thought train I'd had going at the time - generally deeply unsexy and along the lines of 'I need to learn that poem by Friday... where did I leave my phone... I wonder if my ma is going to record Eastenders for me', and while my mind is still a million miles from sex, my entire bloody supply will have gone down to my cunt and I'll be a-gushin' down there. And then there's always that brief 'hold on a minute, I'm not even turned on yet...' moment.