Alma Nopants *I'm Ms. Snow Miser* (almalthia) wrote in ohnotheydidnt,
Alma Nopants *I'm Ms. Snow Miser*

Charlie Sheen Names Mila Kunis As His Ideal 'Goddess' Number Three; Reveals His Plans To Woo Her

It's Mila Kunis' lucky day! Or not...

In his Wednesday night performance of "My Torpedo of Truth/Defeat Is Not an Option" live stage show at the Palace Theater in Columbus, Ohio, Charlie Sheen revealed he'd like to add a brunette to his harem of goddesses - and not just any old brunette - Charlie wants none other than a certain "Black Swan" beauty.

"Mila Kunis. I mean, debate me, right?" he told the adoring crowd regarding which female he'd like to add to his existing goddess duo of Bree Olson and Natalie Kenly. "And here's the good news: My goddesses have already f***ing approved [Mila]... she's pre-approved."

"Two is the ideal number and now you're talking about potentially a third?" moderator Joey Scoleri, who also acts as manager/tour producer, asked Charlie.

"Come on, man. A warlock can, you know, manage so many goddesses," Charlie told the cheering crowd. "I tried three, I tried f***ing three - it doesn't work.

"I would have great tolerance for many items missing provided it involves Mila f***ing Kunis," he continued. "Who wouldn't? If Mila Kunis is stealing your sh*t because you can't pay attention to her, you're still f***ing winning. You're still winning at that moment."

And, as usual, the eccentric actor already has a plan for wooing his latest object of desire.

"I have tremendous faith in the young Mila Kunis -- I'm going to go on her Facebook page and discover her 'likes' and I'm going to buy them all," Charlie revealed. "And then she can come steal them! Super f***ing hot thief!

"Mila, please, we have a warehouse full of your favorite sh*t for you to come steal-- in Sherman Oaks," he added.

As previously reported on, Charlie's live show got off to a rocky start in Detroit, Mich., on Saturday night as the disappointed crowd booed and heckled Charlie, and many audience members shouted "refund."

The former "Two and a Half Men" star continued his tour despite the dismal opening, and was far better received on the second night stop in Chicago, Ill.

By night three, Charlie seemed to be back on the "winning" track, receiving a standing ovation from the crowd in Cleveland, Ohio.


Ew. :(
Tags: charlie sheen, interview, mila kunis
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