Glee Prom Ep Spoilers That Are About to Make Y'all Shake Your Hair Capes Right Off Yo Damn Heads

I'm just gonna get it out of the way. Please do not shoot the messenger...Santana's prom date is...


Okay, now that that's done, for those still with me, and not en route to Ryan Murphy's house with a pickaxe and some duct tape, here are some more spoilers...

Faberry - A Paler Shade of Britannia

Faberry fans rejoice. Lots of juicy stuff.
1. The two will be singing a mashup of I Feel Pretty from West Side Story and Unpretty by TLC. Could be epic, could be epically bad.
2. Finn starts bitching about not wanting to go to prom with Quinn (obviously wants to go with Blaine, stressed plotting Kurt's destruction), Rachel tells him to STFU and get Quinn a corsage with a light green ribbon to match her eyes, nothing that will distract from her gorgeous, stunning, flawless, bornthatbeige face.

Prom King & Queen - (Andrea) Zuckerman - this is my new name for Zizes and Puckerman, you're welcome ONTD, you're welcome.

Jacob Ben Israel was interviewing Puck about Lauren and he said that “Lauren and I are ahead of Santana and Dave” or something like that. He was talking about prom king and queen. Quinn is obvs the front runner, likely with Finn because Lima is apparently dedicated to keeping the Aryan dream alive.

Mac Attack

Two Fleetwood Mac songs are appearing in this ep.
1. Kristin 'Ambien Twitter Queen' Chenoweth and Matt 'Divorcee's Menopausal Dream' Morrison will duet to “Dreams” by Fleetwood Mac in the choir room.
2. Cast is supposedly filming ‘Don’t Stop’ by Fleetwood Mac right now.

GROFF!!!!!!!!!!! Oh, and Some Other People Too.

1. Finn tells Rachel that Jesse is performing at prom, cuz, ya know, people who graduated last year from a TOTALLY different school would absolutely perform at your prom. It's like, totes logical.
2. Sam, Mercedes, Rachel, and Jesse might all be going to prom together. Rachel asks Sam but he says "bitch please." I can only assume this means Sam and Jesse will ripping off each others tuxedos behind the punch bowl while singing the Cazwell classic "All Over My Face" or Sam and Mercedes will be making an adorable mulatto prom night dumpster baby.

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As always with any Ryan Murphy production, these are just rumors (which consequently is the name of the episode) and subject to change whenever Ry Ry gets bored. All I know is, I hope it will feature a Warblers performance of this seminal classic...


Aaaaaand...that's all I got for ya. So long folks!