Here’s Taylor Momsen performing in Philly over the weekend where she’s apparently upped her stage show to just a mesh shirt and a bra. Which would be kind of hot once you factor out all the going to jail and the beer pouch at 17. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying she’s fat because compared to most Americans, Taylor Momsen is a waif. But I’ve seen enough Freshman 15s to spot one a mile away. In fact, if you got me close enough, not only could I tell you which beer she’s been drinking, I’ll suddenly pretend I play the guitar and just want to watch a movie. Think of it as my gift, my curse...
I know you just got back from Applebee's but if you can't button your jeans it's time to switch to sweatpants.
One good poop and she'll be back to normal.