silver's good enough for me (stellawuzadiver) wrote in ohnotheydidnt,
silver's good enough for me
stellawuzadiver
ohnotheydidnt

Blind Vice:

Gay Jackie Sluts It Up With Lady Strippers


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1: It really is the new gay to go to sleazy strip clubs, didn't you know? First, Toothy Tile got into it pretty brazenly. Now Jackie Bouffant—the younger, fresher perkier version of closeted matinee idol Toothy—is pulling that greasy stuff!

And how.

Jackie, who's so pretty he might be mistaken for one of the gorgeous-eyed babes in these joints, is becoming quite the fan of the pole-dancing set. But...he's taking it one heterosexual step further by sleeping with women he meets there (as well as other places) on the side. On the side of his beard, that is!

WTF?

Well, on the one hand, we totally get it.

We wouldn't want to sleep with Jackie's prissy beard, either. But, Jackie's obviously hip to the fact that he's got to get some chicks talking about how well he gets his sex on—and what better way to do it than to put his little Jackie-tool to work!

For the record, just got to say something here.

Think we have a little Nevis Divine action goin' on, sweethearts. Now that Jackie—who still lives to get his boy-action on—has finally tasted the female side of (fabulous) sex, he's decided he may not be so averse to it, after all.

Interesting move, my man. Hey, get the best of both worlds, right? I mean, sounds like you enjoy it enough.

Totally unlike Toothy, trust.

And It Ain't: Taylor Lautner, Robert Pattinson, Matthew Morrison
Previous exclusions are here.



2: Open wide, because this vice is a wet one!

Fernando Tinkle-Treat is a face you've been seeing around a lot lately (and it's a pretty gorgeous one at that). He's been hitting the media circuit, big-time, peddling his recent project where he also happens to be peddling his family-man shtick, too. They sorta go hand in hand.

But, as Hollywood tales go, there's something Fernando's not telling everybody.

Hint: -Super-Duper Cooper totally approves...

Not only is Fernando stepping out on his babe, but he's getting his super-massive kinky wet on when he does it!

Yep, we are talking about golden showers, people.

We hear from a source that was more than willing to um, go there, with Fernando that Mr. F really gets his little tinkle-treat going when he urinates on whomever he is bedding at said time.

And it's pee or bust.

No bladder bedroom session, no bone session. Kapesh? After all, if Tinkle is risking stepping out on the ball and chain, it's gotta be worth it.

What is it with famous folks like F.T.T and Super Duper-Cooper? We think these civilians (and celebs, mainly in Super's sheets ‘tho) just desperately want one night with them that they are willing to forgo bedroom etiquette.

Team Truth has never felt more prudish in our lives!

Let's just say there is a time and a place to poop or pee, and that's in a toilet. Or an outside venue if popping a squat is way necessary.

And It Ain't: Will Smith, Johnny Depp, Justin Bieber


Bonus-Bonus Blind: Veronica Bee-Stings. Read more here

This week's exclusions:


-Prince Horebart Hairplug is not Nicolas Cage.
-Maribeth Bush is not Téa Leoni, January Jones or Elisabeth Moss.
-Lorin Sniffle-Puss is not Dianna Agron.
-Secretia Ohio and Chester Shorts-Off are not Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher.
-Lucretia Johnson is not Beyoncé or Raven-Symoné.
-Strippa Rip-Ya is not Britney Spears.

Eva Longoria-Parker, 50 Cent, Jessica Simpson, Bradley Cooper, Taylor Swift, Paul Wesley, Blake Lively and James Franco have been the subject of a Blind Vice.

MTV's Teen Mom cast and Leighton Meester have not been BVs.


For those keeping score, of the people mentioned this week:

-Jackie Bouffant is not any of these people.
-Lorin Sniffle-Puss is not any of these people.
-Lucretia Johnson is not any of these people.
-Maribeth Bush is not any of these people.
-Nevis Divine is not any of these people.
-Prince Horebart Hairplug is not any of these people.
-Priscilla Desert is not any of these people.
-Secretia Ohio and Chester Shorts-Off are not any of these couples.
-Strippa Rip-Ya is not any of these people.
-Super-Duper Cooper is not any of these people.
-Toothy Tile and Grey Goose are not any of these people


3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8

Last week's puzzle is still unsolved. Here's a hint: the Hello Kitty addict is four years younger than the triple-divorceé video game tester.

Have fun! Here is a grid you can either print out or paste into your favorite graphics editor. Go here for more info on how to solve these. First one to reply with the correct solution wins. If you want to "hide" your guesses, cut and paste the following code:

Tags: blind item
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