This news is probably going to irk some horror fans. Bloody Disgusting brings us word that decidedly non-horror Natalie Portman is wrapping her dainty mitts around one of the horror genre's sharpest blades, 1977's Suspiria from the Italian horror icon Dario Argento. Come to think of it, how more pissed could you be after we learned back in March that director David Gordon Green (of this week's Pineapple Express) would, in fact, helm the remake? Portman's own production company, Handsome Charlie Films, will produce the film. Is it me or does everyone have a production company nowadays? This doesn't seem to be shaping up well for the return of a film that has been described as having "the most vicious murder scene ever filmed." Will Portman be able to bring this remake some justice?
For the life of me, I can't make heads or tails why these two are attached to the project. For Portman, I will say that she does have some range (from Closer to V for Vendetta). However, anything resembling Suspiria is certainly lacking in her resume. She may very well do a fine job as the put-upon American ballet student Suzy, but I (and I imagine many out there besides me) have doubts. Obviously, this is all assuming Argento's style will sustain in the remake, but we're not entirely sure about that yet.
As for Green, well, I know Alex enjoyed spending time with him and Pineapple Express is definitely going to do well, but his involvement is just puzzling. The director freely admitted back in March that "it doesn't make a lick of sense." So who's idea was it? Apparently some "Italian producers came to [Green] about it, wanting to do a pretty amazing, ambitious, artistic [version]." Judging from these comments over the last year and recent developments, it seems that the remake might be a far scream from Argento's original. That's sad. But, when you think about, it'd probably be even more disappointing if these two tried to do an authentic remake.
If you don't recall, Suspiria surrounds "a young American dancer [who] travels to Europe to join a famous ballet school. As she arrives, the camera turns to another young woman, who appears to be fleeing from the school. She returns to her apartment where she is gruesomely murdered by a hideous creature. Meanwhile, the young American is trying to settle in at the ballet school, but hears strange noises and is troubled by bizarre occurrences. She eventually discovers that the school is merely a front for a much more sinister organization." Remakes will be remakes and some will be true to the original while others will be a shoddy "inspiration."
ughh i don't really like natalie portman, but she would be perfect for the role.
anyway, why remake this movie when the original was already perfect?