billy crudup (likegunfire) wrote in ohnotheydidnt,
billy crudup
likegunfire
ohnotheydidnt

Entertainment Weekly's ~14 Movie Franchises We Think Should Stop~

SCARY/EPIC/SUPERHERO/DATE MOVIE

None of these tasteless, unfunny flicks even come close to holding a candle to 1980's Airplane, the prime example of a spoof done right. And at least the Airplane folks had the good sense to make only one terrible sequel.



SAW

Once Dr. Lawrence Gordon (Cary Elwes) began cutting his own foot off with a rusty saw, we were done. And yet, a fifth installment is on its way into multiplexes.

THE MUMMY

We dug the Brendan Fraser-Rachel Weisz action film the first time around, but when it comes to the third film — in theatres Aug. 1, eight long years after the second installment — we think this mummy should have stayed in its tomb.

AMERICAN PIE

The dirty high school comedy rightly cooked up legions of teenage fans, thanks to its illicit appeal and, of course, the always reliable Eugene Levy. But after two sequels, and a string of terrible straight-to-DVD flicks starring the ever-annoying Stifler family, we suddenly had a second reason to dread band camp.

BRING IT ON

I said, Brr! It's cold in here! Must be our reaction to the never-ending Bring It On films! The three installments following the original 2000 film were so terrible, not even a squad of spirit fingers could save the franchise.

AUSTIN POWERS

Somewhere between Mr. Bigglesworth and Alotta Fagina, we fell in love with Mike Myers' James Bond spoof. But the comedian's shtick became all too predictable with its two sequels. Even before Goldmember, the International Man of Mystery was starting to make us bored, baby.

STARSHIP TROOPERS

For the love of Casper Van Dien, did TriStar really need to add two films to the ''bug''-filled B-movie cult classic? We only wish we could swat the sequels away.

INDIANA JONES

Sure, the first three Indy flicks were solid enough to be considered classics, but we'd rather stand in a pit of snakes than see this year's humdrum Kingdom of the Crystal Skull again. Too bad George Lucas didn't take note — he's said he hopes to release a fifth film. But if Indy's dad, played by Sean Connery, isn't going to make any more appearances, we'll just stick to Celebrity Jeopardy.

CRUEL INTENTIONS

Although the 1999 catty teen drama was an undeniable hit, the franchise's two sequels were as ill-advised as Joshua Jackson's blonde 'do.

THE LAND BEFORE TIME

Baby dinosaur Littlefoot found the leaf and found his mother. All was well. Now, if only the animated kidflick series went extinct so we wouldn't have to endure its 12 sequels.

NATIONAL LAMPOON

If your franchise is using Paris Hilton as a last resort, you know its time to put it to bed (and, no, not Hilton's bed). Though National Lampoon started out on a good foot (hello, National Lampoon's Vacation and Animal House!), once Girls of National Lampoon's Strip Poker was released, we realized the franchise was ready to fold.

LEPRECHAUN

We know he's supposed to be scary, but after six installments (culminating in Leprechaun: Back 2 tha Hood), the vertically challenged title character is about as frightening as General Mills' Lucky Charms mascot.

POISON IVY

Letting a Lolita-like bad girl into your home is a bad idea. But an even worse idea is greenlighting three sequels, none of which hold a candle to the not-all-that-great-to-begin-with original.

FRIDAY THE 13TH

Okay, so 2009's Friday the 13th is a remake and not necessarily part of the slasher franchise. Still, that doesn't excuse the slew of Jason films — 11 in total! — that somehow found their way onto the big screen. We were happy to visit Camp Crystal Lake just the once, thankyouverymuch.

source



i didn't know cruel intentions had sequels, wtf.
and the mummy is nothing without Imhotep
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