Donald Trump's private plane flew him into Scotland today, where he plans to convince local residents that they HAVE to let him build that 2 billion dollar golf course he is so excited about.
Because two TV shows, 14 books, 10 properties, 3 resorts, 3 hotels, and 4 regular golf courses are not enough.
'This will be the greatest golf course anywhere in the world; There'll be nothing even close, he said during his last visit to Scotland. 'This is where my mother was born and I should almost kiss the earth.'
As for the opposition from worried environmentalists and local farmers....
* He said: 'We have had some very positive discussions with the representatives of the wind farm and I think they are willing to make certain concessions.'
* He meant: 'In addition to the $2 billion I plan to spend on the golf course, I have made some very "po$itive" offers to the representatives of the wind farm which trump (no pun intended) any concern they have about their stupid farms.'
And watch out EuroDisney, because Donny is settin' up more than just a golf course. His plans include a lavish eight-story hotel, 950 holiday homes, 37 'luxury' lodges, beach attractions, and two championship-size golf courses. Just his typical small pickings.
But even with all the money in the world, Donny just can't fix that hair...