It takes a lot to make you feel sorry for Robin Thicke. And, to be fair, it will take more than what you are about to read, but at the time of writing the gurning pop lothario is very much on the precipice of giving it the full Les Dennis.
The background is that, 11 months after he pranced about with topless models in one of the most miserably iconic pop videos of the modern age – and eight months after a Miley-abetted VMAs performance that pulled off the dubious feat of being almost as degrading to men as it was to women – Thicke separated from his wife, the actor Paula Patton, in February of this year.
There may well be more to the separation than meets the eye, and the rumour mill has been relentless, so let's focus on what we do know, which is that Thicke has been handling the situation with all the poise and grace you would expect from a man whose gift to popular culture is an oeuvre the nipple count of which makes your average edition of the Sunday Sport read like a mid-80s Innovations catalogue. To wit, he has created an entire album, called Paula, with the intention of winning back his wife.
A pop entity more self-aware than Thicke – and that's all of them except Jessie J – might say: "Fair play, this entire debacle has played out in public but should be salvaged, if indeed it can be salvaged at all, in private." Not the case for the Give It 2 U hit-maker. As an opening volley, Thicke told a Washington DC audience in March: "I want everybody here to know that I'm trying to get my girl back." After confirmation that his next album would indeed be titled Paula the announcement came of album's tracklisting. Opening with You're My Fantasy, Thicke's 14-track opus subsequently delivers, in order, Get Her Back, Still Madly Crazy, Lock the Door, and Whatever I Want, which reads less like a romantic gesture and more like a plot to violate a restraining order. Love Can Grow Back, pleads track seven, while by track 10 Robin is hurtling into the oft-ignored "foot appendage" portion of the five stages of grief with a song called Tippy Toes.( Collapse )