It's Not Right But It's Okay (317)
It most certainly is NOT okay.
Teenage Dream (206)
I don't hate this one for what it is, I hate it for what it gave us. It turned what was supposed to be a three-episode guest role into Darren Criss's facial expressions stinking up an already stinking show. It gave us fucking Klaine. And then I had to see this dude jumping in the air in those damned pink sunglasses on every red carpet for the next two years. Fuck you, Blaine. Fuck you, Ryan Murphy.
Let's Have A Kiki/Turkey Lurkey Time (408)
I mentioned earlier that after watching the first three seasons, the only other episode I watched was the season 4 Thanksgiving episode, which features this absolute abomination. Whose idea was this? Who ALLOWED this? Jesus Christ. No wonder I didn't start watching again.
Thong Song (107)
Will Schuester was a creep and Emma should have married John Stamos.
...Baby One More Time (202)
This song started a trend of Glee giving Rachel songs that absolutely did not suit her voice. While I am not a fan of Lea Michele, I will admit that her voice is...decent, but she oversings and it makes every song sound the same. It's Britney Spears, Lea. Not Broadway. This song should have been given to literally any other main female cast member at the time. See also: Firework.
Cough Syrup (314)
If I was a member of Young The Giant, I would have sued Ryan Murphy for this. I mean, vocally it's fine (for Blaine), but editing it in with attempted suicide? How did this get greenlit?
Gangnam Style (408)
Another monstrosity from the season 4 Thanksgiving episode. Somewhere around mid-season two Glee started covering every Top 40 song, whether it worked in the show or not. Some of them worked (Without You, Edge of Glory). This one absolutely did not. Let's just be grateful Glee ended before we had to see Blaine doing Old Town Road or Kurt doing Truth Hurts by Lizzo. Additionally, I LOVE seeing Tina get a moment to shine, but of all the songs to give her, you pick this one?? Also, Melissa Benoist's character passes out at the end of this and it's still less embarrassing then the actual performance.
What Does The Fox Say? (507)
I'm gonna let Kevin McHale speak for me.
This. This was the moment my soul left my body. and I wanted everyone at home to know. https://t.co/21prZ8qEvb— Kevin McHale (@druidDUDE) July 27, 2020
I Wanna Dance With Somebody (317)
You know, it's strange. There's nothing really wrong with this song, but for some reason I've just never cared for it? Maybe because it's my favorite Whitney Houston song and I really wanted Amber Riley to sing it?
At The Ballet (420)
I have never seen A Chorus Line in my life and even I know this isn't working.
You know, having them sing a song to Blaine that's about a sewer rat might actually be one of the more accurate comparisons done on this show.
I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How To Dance With You (220)
Blaine did not even GO to McKinley at the time, he was only at the dance as Kurt's date. Why was he allowed to sing? Also, why were Brittany and Tina always the choices for backup singers/dancers? (See also: Single Ladies, Spotlight, the one time Lauren Zizes got to sing...).
Anyway, I mostly hate this song because this is Blaine trying to be ~quirky. I hate quirky. And I hate Blaine.
I'm actually offended. Out of everybody they could have given this song to, they choose BLAINE? Why not Santana? Or Mercedes? Artie if you wanted to have it sung by a guy? Even Quinn? Also that video still. ICU, Ryan Murphy.
Big Girls Don't Cry (319)
Lea, Darren, and Chris were clear favorites of Ryan Murphy's, and they frequently had songs together despite the fact that their voices really did not go well together. Lea oversings, Darren tries to be the center of attention, and Chris Colfer was constantly forced to sing at a higher register than he was comfortable with. It's pretty clear in this song, which is terrible. Also, this song would have been better as an all-girls song. Mercedes, Santana, Tina, Quinn and even Brittany would have been better additions than Klaine.
Happy Days Are Here Again/Get Happy (204)
I don't actually hate Chris Colfer's voice as much as a lot of people do. I really liked his parts in Time Warp, and even Rose's Turn was okay, for example. The problem is, as mentioned, they continually give him songs that do not suit his voice. Glee also loved to give Rachel and Kurt duets despite the fact that they just did not sound that great together. Defying Gravity was alright but other than that, I just haven't been a fan of any of their duets. (Same goes for any of their trios with Santana in the later seasons)
Crazy In Love/Hair (111)
I don't know who had the idea to combine these songs, but I hope they were fired. Sue notably had this as her second worst Glee performance after Run Joey Run (but that's iconic)
Blurred Lines (505)
Again, just because a song reached the Top 40 does not mean you had to use it! At the very least, why put Will on the song? I still think they should have swapped this out for Daft Punk's "Get Lucky" which was just as popular the previous summer, but less creepy.
I Still Believe/Super Bass
I swear I didn't set out to have this list be so Blaine-heavy but his performances are just so cringey. Sue didn't join in on the musical numbers very often, and they were usually some sort of "hallucination" type deal or other gag (Vogue, Physical). This one, though...it just doesn't work. Jane Lynch actually has a fine voice, but this whole performance is so awkward.
A Little Less Conversation (312)
Will fucking Schuester, ladies and gentlemen.
Shoutouts to Heather Morris and Harry Shum Jr. for the dancing, however.
I was also going to include Hot for Teacher but all of the videos have Mark Salling's face on the cover, so I opted not to include it in here as I felt it may make some people uncomfortable. It's terrible though, I assure you. It's on YouTube if you must watch it.
I would like to give (dis)honorable mentions to How To Be A Heartbreaker and Girls Just Want To Have Fun. Also any time Will raps.
Anyway, as a palate cleanser, here are four of my favorite Glee covers that I don't think get enough attention:
Up Up Up (Quinn and Artie). An unexpected duet, but it works well.
Something Stupid (Brittany and Sam). This was in season four, so I hadn't seen it before, but I found it very cute.
Anything Goes/Anything You Can Do by whatever this character's name was. I don't remember. She should have been a series regular, though.
I Can't Go For That/You Make My Dreams by the group (Mainly Finn, Quinn, Tina, and the Irish dude I think). Overshadowed by the amazing Adele mashup, but still very good.
ONTD, what are your favorite and least favorite Glee performances?
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