beysactingcoach (beysactingcoach) wrote in ohnotheydidnt,

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Kittens, Let's Talk About the Season 3 Premiere of Love After Lockup!

Time to plug in! OP is back because you’re probably running out of things to watch in quarantine or just tired of the sophisticated cinema verité and need just a little sewage to balance things out. Welp, the third season of Love After Lockup is back with new foolishness. It’s been a rough couple of months, let’s judge people! The premise of the show is that people have found love wirh people who are incarcerated and are going to be released. Will their relationships last on the outside?

Meet Scott and Lizzie, ahem I mean Lindsay. He is 51 and she is 27. Claiming to be a successful businessman, he moved from upstate New York to Mississippi to be with Lindsay once she gets out of jail. She was caught on a high speed chase and was caught with large amounts of crystal meth. Lindsay does reveal how life is during the pandemic – sounds as though only prison staff get PPE which yikes. She says they are allowed some rec time but observing distancing, other than that just in their cells. The inmates are getting restless and frustrated and it “feels like a dark cloud looming over the prison”. (Really hope there’s some change and they get some more protections. Scott says his past relationships were on a “short term, as needed basis” (cough cough sugar daddy).

MadTV Laguna Beeotch voice* Jessica! met Maurice on Plenty of Fish when his profile pictures showed he was in prison. Y’all know the story she’s white middle class suburbia with conservative parents who’s attracted to black guy from Compton. They’ve been married for a couple of years and her sister will not speak to her because of it. Later MadTV Laguna Beeotch voice* Jessica! and her tacky manicure tries to see her sister to speak with her, but drives on past because she’s scared.

John, a Dollar Tree Bob Odenkirk, met Kristianna on a prison dating website. She was charged with burglary and parole violations. But Run, Kristianna, Run! He’s been married four times and engaged two and wants to marry this woman. Don’t doooooooooooooooooooooooo it. He had to count on hand how many children he had. He once put an ad on Craigslist looking for a boo and someone answered.

Next up we have Shavel and Quaylon, the lost Migos. Shavel’s mother is understandably apprehensive about thee relationship considering Quaylon has never been in a serious relationship or has children. (Shavel is a single mother to a five-year-old girl.) Maybe a ruse because out of nowhere it’s mentioned that Shavel was an inspiring rapper who was scammed by a “producer”.

Shawn and a possible Catfish, Destinie. Dude has six kids with his former partner of 22 years, but she wasn’t the one. Stringing along level on lock! His friends think his new bae is a catfish because he’s forked over $30,000 to ha and because she's flight risk, if Destinie escapes again, he's on the hook for $50K for her bail.


Nicknames coming next week!
Tags: arrest / arrest warrant, legal / lawsuit, reality show
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