I live, I die, I live again (sandstorm) wrote in ohnotheydidnt,
I live, I die, I live again
sandstorm
ohnotheydidnt

ONTD Original: What To Watch to Replace the Missing Movies of Spring 2020

First off - Buzzfeed, fuck off.

Second, ah, I hope your plans weren't like mine, and hinged on going to the movies about 4 times in March and April! Because thanks to Bag-Snatcher Corona, many belowline workers on TV and film sets aren't being paid. Oh, and giant media conglomerates aren't making billions. Poor them.

So, what can you watch instead?

Note: This is based upon the North American release dates. Some movies have been delayed overseas that have already been released here.

What can you watch instead of A QUIET PLACE PART II, scheduled for release later in 2020?






  • A Quiet Place

  • The Invisible Man

  • Us

  • Underwater

  • Alien

  • The Invitation

  • 10 Cloverfield Lane


Or, you can stay at home, close your mouth, and just sit there for a few hours.






What can you watch instead of MULAN, scheduled for release later in 2020?


  • T-The animated One?

  • Or the sequel, Mulan II

  • Read the original ballad of Hua Mulan. Here's the Wiki page to start.

  • Mulan: Rise of a Warrior from 2009

  • Ralph Breaks the Internet for about 5 seconds








What can you watch instead of NO TIME TO DIE, now scheduled for November 25th, 2020?


  • The other 24 movies in the James Bond franchise. I am not listing them all bc ONTD doesn't read.

  • Kingsman: The Secret Service

  • Kingsman: The Golden Circle

  • The Man from UNCLE

  • Spy

  • The Get Smart Remake

  • Spies in Disguise


What can you watch instead of THE LOVEBIRDS, set to be released TBD?

  • The Photograph (If you can still find it in theaters and you want to take that chance).

  • Bonnie and Clyde?

  • Some other romance movie?

  • IDK I've watched all of one romance movie in the past 5 years.


What can you watch instead of THE NEW MUTANTS set for later release Never?



Instead of watching a movie, you can:


What have ya'll be watching every time it got delayed for the past 3 years? Watch it again! Or you can watch...

  • X-Men

  • X-Men 2

  • X-Men Last Stand

  • X-Men: Days of Future Past

  • X-Men: Apocalypse


What can you watch instead of PETER RABBIT 2: THE RUNAWAY, now set for August 7th, 2020?



April 10th is the release of TROLLS WORLD TOUR. Who knows if it will make it?



What can you watch instead of ANTLERS, scheduled for later this year?

  • Read the short story it's based upon.

  • Something with brownhaired white boys and magic and supernatural abilities:

  • A Monster Calls

  • Harry Potter

  • The House with A Clock in Its Walls

  • My Spy (Which was pushed here from March 13th). Though, if you are in Australia or the UK, you are the only people in the world who have seen it.




This has already seeped into May 2020:





F9 has been pushed from Memorial Day to April 2021. You can watch -

  • The other 8 movies in the series.

  • Arguably Bloodshot.

  • The Green Hornet

  • Those corny but still entertaining GI Joe movies from the early 2010s.

Theoreticals:

If BLACK WIDOW is pushed:


  • Watch the other 29428275825 MCU films.

  • Watch some DCEU films.

  • Then you can watch the 2 good ones, Shazam! and Birds of Prey.


If ARTEMIS FOWL is delayed:

  • I'm the only one who cares anyway 🤷🏾‍♀️ 😔



src:
This handy wikipedia page, and other sources are in the post
Tags: covid-19, disney, james bond, marvel, ontd original
Subscribe
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    Comments allowed for members only

    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

  • 41 comments
Previous
← Ctrl ← Alt
Next
Ctrl → Alt →
Previous
← Ctrl ← Alt
Next
Ctrl → Alt →