carolinalily (carolinalily) wrote in ohnotheydidnt,

Brutally Honest Oscar Voter (Producer) Who Loves Once Upon a Time

Whew this is another mixed bag HOT TAKE from a man who is (probably) older based on clues, and is otherwise definitely a Democrat.

Some highlights re/Best Picture

. Favorite film was Yesterday which didn’t get nominated

. Hated Ford v Ferrari because the director (Mangold) didn’t know anything about car racing. Compares to Grand Prix (1966). Makes a funny reference about the bro-love staring between the two characters racing.

. Hated Little Women because the timeline was ridiculous (younger vs adult) and felt Saoirse at least cutting her hair gave him a reference for timeline

. Didn’t like Marriage Story because he felt he needed to care for the kid, but he didn’t /harsh lol. Felt Driver and Scarjo put everything in to their roles but wasn’t here for entitled people’s marital problems (more lol).

. He liked The Irishman but it wasn’t better than Casino and it was so long his ass was sore and he wanted to get tf outta there (even more lol)

. Loved Parasite and has nice things to say about film and director but it lost him when /spoiler/ started

. Thought Joker was excellent but not for Best Picture

. 1917 was gimmicky and rang hollow

. Loved JoJo Rabbit and Once Upon a Time but went with OUATIH as first vote. Doesn’t relish QT films but this film made him feel good. He’s not at a high point in his career now, so he could also relate to the theme. Full ranking at source.

Click for more of this older (Grand Prix reference, career waning, more OUAT era firsthand knowledge) straight (he actually says it), anti Tr’mp/admin (many references), who was probably sitting in a bar drinking an Old Fashioned while smoking a Cuban cigar and wearing an outfit straight out of The Irishman. [Spoiler (click to open)]

. Tarantino for Director because he did a first class job. 1917 was more visual than directing, Joker was more acting than directing, The Irishman wasn’t Scorcese’s best (fawns over Casino again), Bong Hoon Jo is smart and talented but QT in the end.

. Phoenix for Actor, he killed it. Thought Banderas was best he’s ever done, didn’t like 2Popes so No to Pryce, felt bad for Driver’s character because his wife wasn’t more compassionate (yikes), thought Leo was also great.

. Renee for Actress who was transformational. Is really really rooting for her as a person per his comments. Scarjo woe is me speech was great but didn’t like film overall, Saoirse was great in Little Women but hated the movie, (throws some shade at Greta/Ronan eeks), Erivo was good but movie felt like sanitized Disney version versus 12 Years a Slave, liked Charlize.

. Pitt for Supporting Actor because he nailed it as the loyal buddy. Didn’t feel Hanks was Rogers, felt the others were so great it was a hard choice. Pacino didn’t feel fresh, Pesci was stellar.

. Margot for Supporting Actress, has a crush on her but still overall felt she nailed the character and he empathized with her character’s predicament. Has a low-key rant about Hustlers/JLo (not about her specifically but the film itself). Thought Pugh was fine but hated Little Women. Dern is so likable irl but was ott in her role. Bates phoned in her performance (bloop).

. JoJo for Adapted Screenplay because even though it was an adapted screenplay it was an original story. More shade at Little Women timeline. Didn’t care for Popes. Liked Joker but JoJo won out.

. Once Upon a Time for Original Screenplay because it captured everything that is Hollywood. Hated Little Women (yes we know!). 1917 was one note. Parasite was excellent. But all the love for OUATIH.

. The Missing Link for Animated Film because it was hopeful. Thought Klaus (the surprise winner so far) was unwatchable. Drags Toy Story 4 because he’s tired of franchise fucking Campbell’s Soup movies (cackles).

. The Cave for Documentary, it reminded him there’s still good in the world, recommends same director’s earlier release Last Men in Aleppo. Lots of political comments about the other nominees, dude is definitely a Democrat.

. Les Miserable for International Film, felt visceral and real. Didn't like Pain and Glory except for Banderas. Liked Parasite but it lost him in the end.

. 1917 for Cinematography, blah di blah about the rest

. The Irishman for Costume Design because they nailed the mobster looks. Liked all the others except that JoJo didn’t have to reinvent anything.

. JoJo for Editing, thought the timing of the cuts were essential to the humor

. Judy for Hair and Makeup. Also thought Bombshell nailed it but felt it was a TV movie with big stars (lol). Hated Maleficent, had to force himself to watch it.

. Once Upon a Time for Production Design, they recreated exactly what Hollywood looked like back then

. Joker for Original Score. Yawned at Star Wars (ha ha).

. Rocketman song for Best Song, because it was the only song he felt was fresh and he might listen to if it were on the radio today

. 1917 for Sound Editing, Once Upon a Time for Sound Mixing, The Lion King for Special Effects (drags Marvel and Star Wars lol) but he’s a big animal lover so there you go. Kitbull for Animated Short, Walk Run Cha Cha for Documentary Short, The Neighbor’s Window for Live Action Short.

Ontd any guesses on this anonymous Oscar voter?

Tags: #oscars, award show - academy awards, film - producers, magazine covers and articles

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