FIFTY SHADES OF FUCKERY
Since the Fifty Shades Trilogy has been deemed as an “ode to consent”, I thought I would highlight all the fuckery in these books and how it is the complete opposite. The trilogy has gone on to make $1 billion at the box office (vomit) because women have been sexually repressed and shamed for the longest so they naturally loved these books. Who doesn’t dream of marrying a billionaire with mommy issues that leaves ~love bites~ all over your body so you can’t wear revealing clothing?!
This will be a three part ONTD Original that is dedicated to every book in the trilogy.
PART THREE: FIFTY SHADES FREED
The last book left off with Ana agreeing to marry Christian after he has a near death experience. Ana gets into a heated argument with Mrs. Robinson at a party and Christian's mother finds out that her friend started a relationship with Christian when he was only 15.
The book starts off with Ana and Christian on their honeymoon in Monaco. The couple are sunbathing and Christian is reading some rich guy book.
“You’ll burn.” Christian whispers in my ear, startling me from my doze.
“Only for you.” I give him my sweetest smile. The late afternoon sun has shifted, and I am under its full glare. He smirks and in one swift move pulls my sun lounger into the shade of the parasol.
“Out of the Mediterranean sun, Mrs. Grey.”
“Thank you for your altruism, Mr. Grey.”
“My pleasure, Mrs. Grey, and I’m not being altruistic at all. If you burn, I won’t be able to touch you.” He raises an eyebrow, his eyes shining with mirth, and my heart expands. “But I suspect you know that and you’re laughing at me.”
She asks him how he would feel if she were to take her top off at the beach like other women there.
“How would you feel if I went topless, like the other women on the beach?” I ask.
“Displeased,” he says without hesitation. “I’m not very happy about you wearing so little right now.” He leans down and whispers in my ear. “Don’t push your luck.”
“Is that a challenge, Mr. Grey?”
“No. It’s a statement of fact, Mrs. Grey.”
I sigh and shake my head. Oh, Christian . . . my possessive, jealous, control freak Christian.
When he’s finished, he slaps my behind.
“You’ll do, wench.”
After they play around in the water, Ana decides to be defiant like the feminist she is (Gloria Steinem who?) and sunbathes topless. As she is sunbathing, she dreams about their wedding. She doesn't take off her dress as Christian wants to be the one to take off her dress.
“I’m not changing.”
“What?” my mother says.
“Christian doesn’t want me to.” I shrug as if this should explain everything.
Her brow furrows briefly.
“You didn’t promise to obey,” she reminds me tactfully. Kate tries to disguise her snort as a cough. I narrow my eyes at her. Neither she nor my mother have any idea of the fight Christian and I had about that. I don’t want to rehash that argument. Jeez, can my Fifty Shades sulk . . . and have nightmares. The memory is sobering.
“I know, Mom, but he likes this dress, and I want to please him.”
Her expression softens. Kate rolls her eyes and tactfully moves away to leave us alone.”
She wakes up from her dream to find Christian fuming over her sunbathing topless
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Christian shouts, waking me from my very pleasant dream. He’s standing all wet and beautiful at the end of my sun lounger and glaring down at me.
What have I done? Oh no . . . I’m lying on my back . . . Crap, crap, crap and he’s mad. Shit. He’s really mad.”
Ana wakes up to find Christian super angry and tries to defend herself.
“I was on my front. I must have turned over in my sleep.” I whisper weakly in my defense.
His eyes blaze with fury. He reaches down, scoops up my bikini top from his sun lounger and tosses it at me.
“Put this on!” he hisses.
“Christian, no one is looking.”
“Trust me. They’re looking. I’m sure Taylor and the security crew are enjoying the show!” he snarls.”
This chapter is absolutely infuriating and it's why claims of this book being "empowering" to women are frustrating. SHE CAN'T EVEN SUNBATHE TOPLESS. He gets so mad at her for making her own decisions and it's disgusting. HE DOES NOT OWN HER BODY but he thinks he does.
“Once the waitress has left, Christian snatches up his book and BlackBerry and masks his fury behind mirrored aviator glasses. He’s bristling with tension and anger. My heart sinks. Every other woman on the beach is topless—it’s not that big of a crime. In fact I look odd with my top on. I sigh inwardly, my spirits sinking. I thought Christian would see the funny side . . . sort of . . . maybe if I’d stayed on my front, but his sense of humor has evaporated.
“Please don’t be mad at me,” I whisper, taking his book and BlackBerry from him and placing them in my backpack.
“Too late for that,” he says quietly—too quietly. ”
He whisks her away from the beach and takes her for a ride on a jetski. He takes her back to the boat and Ana assumes he's going to punish her for sunbathing topless.
“Would you like a drink?” he asks me.
“Do I need one?”
He cocks his head to one side. “Why would you say that?” His voice is soft.
“You know why.”
He frowns as if weighing something in his mind.
Oh, what is he thinking?
“Two gin and tonics, please. And some nuts and olives,” he says to the steward, who nods and quickly vanishes.
“You think I’m going to punish you?” Christian’s voice is silky.
“Do you want to?”
This has become a norm for her. Ana knows that any time she "messes up", she's going to be punished one way or another.
Christian takes Ana to bed and handcuffs her. As he's taking off her clothes, he tells her that he's going to "staple" her bikini top to her. He tells her she was disobedient and asks her what are they going to do about it.
“You were very disobedient,” he murmurs in my ear, sending delicious shivers through me.
“Yes,” I whisper.
“Hmm. What are we going to do about that?”
“Learn to live with it,” I breathe. His soft languid kisses are driving me wild.
He grins against my neck.
“Ah, Mrs. Grey. You are ever the optimist.”
He straightens. Taking my hair, he carefully parts it into three strands, braids it slowly, and then fastens my hair tie to the end. He tugs my braid gently and leans down to my ear. “I am going to teach you a lesson,” he murmurs.”
After waking up from the bad sex, Ana wakes up and sees HICKEYS all over her body.
“My subconscious peers over her half-moon specs and tuts disapprovingly, while my inner goddess slumbers on her chaise longue, out for the count. I gape at my reflection. My wrists have a red welt around them from the handcuffs. No doubt they’ll bruise. I examine my ankles—more welts. Holy hell, I look like I’ve been in some sort of accident. I gaze at myself, trying to absorb how I look. My body is so different these days. It’s changed subtly since I’ve known him . . . I’ve become leaner and fitter, and my hair is glossy and well cut. My nails are manicured, my feet pedicured, my eyebrows threaded and beautifully shaped. For the first time in my life, I’m well groomed—except for these hideous love bites.
I don’t want to think about grooming at the moment. I’m too mad. How dare he mark me like this, like some teenager. In the short time we’ve been together, he’s never given me hickeys. I look like hell. I know why he’s done this. Damn control freak. Right! My subconscious folds her arms beneath her small bosom—he’s gone too far this time.
Ana confronts him about marking her body and he basically did it because he was mad about her sunbathing topless.
“Christian, you have to stop unilaterally trying to bring me to heel. You made your point on the beach. Very effectively, as I recall.”
He shrugs minutely. “Well, you won’t take your top off again,” he murmurs petulantly.
And this justifies what he’s done to me? I glare at him. “I don’t like you leaving marks on me. Well, not this many, anyway. It’s a hard limit!” I hiss at him.
“I don’t like you taking your clothes off in public. That’s a hard limit for me,” he growls.”
He apologizes for his disgusting behavior and she accuses him of acting "adolescent". He says he has a lot to learn and she says they both do. Of course she gets over it and they spend the day together. Christian takes her back to bed and notices she shaved her pubic hair off. He notices she missed some hair and wants to shave it for her. Ana is initially against it but notices that it turns Christian on. She allows him to do it since it makes him happy.
Christian is mad that Ana won't change her last name at work, the company he also owns. He comes to her work to confront her about it.
“Now, Ms. Steele, where were we?”
“You were rudely interrupting my work day to fight with me about my name.”
Christian blinks once—surprised, I think, by the vehemence in my voice.
Deftly, he picks at an invisible piece of lint on his knee with long skilled fingers.
It’s distracting. He’s doing it on purpose. I narrow my eyes at him.
“I like to make the odd impromptu visit. It keeps management on their toes, wives in their place. You know.” He shrugs, his mouth set in an arrogant line.
Wives in their place! “I had no idea you could spare the time,” I snap.
His eyes frost. “Why don’t you want to change your name here?” he asks, his voice deathly quiet.
“Christian, do we have to discuss this now?”
“I’m here. I don’t see why not.”
“I have a ton of work to do, having been away for the last three weeks.”
He gazes at me, his eyes cool and assessing—distant even. I marvel that he can appear so cold after last night, after the last three weeks. Shit. He must be so mad—really mad. When will he learn not to overreact?
“Are you ashamed[…]”
He manages to make the situation about him like all men do. He wants everyone to know she's "his" even though she wears a wedding ring. He tells her the ring isn't enough.
“I am yours—look.” I hold up my left hand, showing my wedding and engagement rings.
“It’s not enough.”
“Not enough that I married you?” My voice is barely a whisper.
He blinks, registering the horror on my face. Where can I go from here?
What else can I do?
“That’s not what I mean,” he snaps and runs a hand through his overlong hair so that it flops onto his forehead.
“What do you mean?”
He swallows. “I want your world to begin and end with me,” he says, his expression raw. His comment completely derails me. It’s like he’s punched me hard in the stomach, winding and wounding me. And the vision comes to mind of a small, frightened, copper-haired gray-eyed boy in dirty, mismatched, ill-fitting clothes.
“It does,” I say without guile, because it’s the truth. “I’m just trying to establish a career, and I don’t want to trade on your name. I have to do something, Christian. I can’t stay imprisoned at Escala or the new house with nothing to do. I’ll go crazy. I’ll suffocate. I’ve always worked, and I enjoy this. This is my dream job; it’s all I’ve ever[…]”
He also wants to rename the company to Grey Publishing and gift it to her as a wedding a present. He asks her if he needs to change it to Steele Publishing instead considering she doesn't want to change her name at work. Back at home, Ana expresses issue with how he dealt with her disagreeing with him. He brings up his ~issues~ and she tells him she's not a child or a asset.
“But I’m not a child, and I’m not an asset.”
“I know.” He sighs.
“Then stop treating me as though I am,” I whisper, imploring him.
He brushes the back of his fingers down my cheek and runs the tip of his thumb across my bottom lip.
“Don’t be mad. You’re so precious to me. Like a priceless asset, like a child,”
It's also revealed that Christian is very anti-gun unlike POTUS and the GOP. Ana seems to be in favor of the second amendment. Not only can she not turn on a computer but she loves guns.
There's a problem when your demonic husband is against guns but you love them.
Oh and Ana has the IT department change her last name to "Grey" which makes Christian very happy. He's so happy he uses a smiley face in his email to her. Christian is off to New York for work purposes and Ana is going to meet up with Kate for some drinks. He's so worried that she's going out while the person who tried to sabotage his helicopter is still out there. Ana agrees to have Kate come over the apartment instead. Kate insists that they go to the bar and just have one drink. Ana convinces the bodyguards to let them go. Kate tells Ana how security has tripled for the family and Ana was unaware about her former boss being a threat to the whole family.
Christian finds out she "disobeyed" him and is pissssed. My autocorrect turned "pissed" to "possessed" and I also find that to be an appropriate word to describe this psychopath.
Good thing Ana wasn't at the apartment as Jack Hyde tried to break in. Christian comes back earlier than scheduled and just watches Ana sleep.
“It would appear so.”
Slowly I pull myself up into a sitting position, not taking my eyes off him.
My mouth is dry. “How long have you been sitting there watching me sleep?”
“You’re still mad.” I can hardly speak the words.
He gazes at me, as if considering his response. “Mad,” he says as if testing the word, weighing up its nuances, its meaning. “No, Ana. I am way, way beyond mad.”
Holy crap. I try to swallow, but it’s hard with a dry mouth.”
“I’m okay. We’re all okay. A bit shaken. But Gail is fine. Ryan is fine. And Jack is gone.”
He shakes his head. “No thanks to you,” he mutters.
What? I lean back, and glare at him. “What do you mean?”
“I don’t want to argue about it right now, Ana.”
I blink. Well, maybe I do, but I decide against it. At least he’s talking to me. I nestle into him once more. His fingers move to my hair and start playing with it.
“I want to punish you,” he whispers. “Really beat the shit out of you,” he adds.
My heart leaps into my mouth. Fuck. “I know,” I whisper as my scalp prickles.
“Maybe I will.”
“I hope not.”
Ana wonders why Christian came home. Was it because she went out with Kate despite him not wanting her to or because of Jack trying to kidnap her. She sends him an angry email and unleashes on him. She tells she's a grown ass woman and can make her own decisions. She also confronts him about hiding the situation with Jack Hyde from her considering everyone but her knew.
Christian confirms he flew back from New York because she "defied" him
“Why did you fly back from New York?” I whisper. Let’s get this over and done with.
“You know why.” His tone carries a warning ring.
“Because I went out with Kate?”
“Because you went back on your word, and you defied me, putting yourself at unnecessary risk.”
“Went back on my word? Is that how you see it?” I gasp, ignoring the rest of his sentence.
Of course they make up and have sex. He takes her to the Red Room and repeatedly denies her orgasms which prompts Ana to use the safe word. He, AGAIN, turns it on her and says that orgasm denial is "standard" and she never does what she's told.
Ana is at work when Leila shows up along with another submissive of Christian's. Leila apologizes for that night and asks if she can see Christian. Ana tells her that he's an adult and he makes those decisions on his own. Leila has tried to meet with him but he's rejected her requests. She wanted to thank him for getting her help and for paying for her art classes. Christian shows up to the office all mad and shit. He fires Prescott, Ana's bodyguard, and angrily approaches Leila.
“I wanted to see you, and you wouldn’t let me,” she whispers.
“So you came here to harass my wife?” His voice is quiet. Too quiet.
Leila looks down at the table again.
He stands, glowering at her. “Leila, if you come anywhere near my wife again, I will cut off all support. Doctors, art school, medical insurance—all of it—gone. Do you understand?”
“Christian—” I try again. But he silences me with a chilling look. Why is he being so unreasonable? My compassion for this sad woman blooms.
“Yes,” she says, her voice just audible.”
Ana is approached by Dr. Greene, the OB/GYN, and is asked why she's missed her last four appointments to get her shot for birth control. She has Ana take a pregnancy test and she turns out to be pregnant. Shocker!
Ana goes low-key Ross Gellar and is questioning the shot considering it's supposed to be "reliable". The doctor claps back and reminds Ana that she missed four appointments. She performs an ultrasound and Ana starts calling the baby "blip". Ana tells Christian she's pregnant after she gets home from work and the conversation doesn't exactly go to well.
His brow furrows with incomprehension. “How?”
How . . . how? What sort of ridiculous question is that? I blush, and give him a quizzical how-do-you-think look.
His stance changes immediately, his eyes hardening to flint. “Your shot?” he snarls.
“Did you forget your shot?”
I just gaze at him unable to speak. Jeez, he’s mad—really mad.
“Christ, Ana!” He bangs his fist on the table, making me jump, and stands so abruptly he almost knocks the dining chair over. “You have one thing, one thing to remember. Shit! I don’t fucking believe it. How could you be so stupid?”
Stupid! I gasp. Shit. I want to tell him that the shot was ineffective, but words fail me. I gaze down at my fingers. “I’m sorry,” I whisper.”
“I know the timing’s not very good.”
“Not very good!” he shouts. “We’ve known each other five fucking minutes.
I wanted to show you the fucking world and now . . . Fuck. Diapers and vomit and shit!” He closes his eyes. I think he’s trying to contain his temper and losing the battle.
“Did you forget? Tell me. Or did you do this on purpose?” His eyes blaze and anger emanates off him like a force field.
“No,” I whisper. I can’t tell him about Hannah—he’d fire her. I know.
“I thought we’d agreed on this!” he shouts.
“I know. We had. I’m sorry.”
He ignores me. “This is why. This is why I like control. So shit like this doesn’t come along and fuck everything up.”
No . . . Little Blip. “Christian, please don’t shout at me.” Tears start to slip down my face.
“Don’t start with waterworks now,” he snaps. “Fuck.” He runs a hand through his hair, pulling at it as he does. “You think I’m ready to be a father?” His voice catches, and it’s a mixture of rage and panic.”
He's fucking insane. He calls her stupid AND asks her if she did it on purpose. The timeline also seems really off because I feel like they've been together for such a short amount of time and managed to miss four appointments. I don't think E.L. James is some amazing writer but how can you fuck up the timeline? Anywho, Christian is a raging asshole and immediately makes Ana feel like shit. He ends up storming off and leaving the apartment. He returns in the middle of the night and is drunk. Ana ends up taking care of him and putting him to sleep. As she's putting away his jacket, his phone falls out and she sees a text from Mrs. Robinson.
Chapter Twenty One
Ana confronts Christian the next day and they get into a fight. She asks him if he slept with Mrs. Robinson and he's quick to deny it. Ana calls him "spineless" and tells him she's moving her stuff to another room.
“Very slowly, Christian retreats one step, his demeanor hardening. “Is that what you want?” he whispers.
“I don’t know what I want any more.” My tone mirrors his, and it takes a monumental effort to feign disinterest while I casually dip the tips of my fingers into my moisturizer and smooth it gently over my face. I peer at myself in the mirror.
Blue eyes wide, face pale, but cheeks flushed. You’re doing great. Don’t back down now. Don’t back down now.
“You don’t want me?” he whispers.
Oh—no . . . oh no you don’t, Grey.
“I’m still here aren’t I?” I snap. Taking my mascara, I apply some first to my right eye.
“You’ve thought about leaving?” His words are barely audible.
“When one’s husband prefers the company of his ex-mistress, it’s usually not a good sign.” I pitch the disdain at just the right level, evading his question. Lip gloss now. I pout my shiny lips at the image in the mirror. Stay strong, Steele . . .”
“You really fucked up yesterday,” I whisper, my anger boiling over. “I’ve had a lot to deal with over the last few weeks.”
“You really fucked up three or four weeks ago. Or whenever you forgot your shot.”
“Well, God forbid I should be perfect like you!”
Oh stop, stop, stop. We stand glowering at each other.
“This is quite a performance, Mrs. Grey,” he whispers.”
To summarize all the fuckery that happens, Jack kidnaps Rita Ora and asks Ana for ransom money. She goes to the bank and gets it and makes it seem like to Christian that she's leaving him so he could authorize the transaction. After she leaves the bank, Jack gets violent with Ana and she ends up in the hospital. Blip is fine and Christian is okay with her pregnancy now even though he thinks he'll be a shitty dad. It's revealed that Christian and Jack were in the same foster system or some shit and lived together at one point. Ana and Christian clear the air about Mrs. Robinson and everything is okay.
There's also this really fucked up and creepy quote in the epilogue after they have sex:
“How’s my daughter?”
“She’s dancing.” I laugh.
“Dancing? Oh yes! Wow. I can feel her.” He grins as Blip Two somersaults inside me.
“I think she likes sex already.”
Christian frowns. “Really?” he says dryly. He moves so his lips are against my bump. “There’ll be none of that until you’re thirty, young lady.”
sources: Fifty Shades Freed by E.L. James + my brain
*mods i fixed the source*