ONTD Original™ - Halloween Edition: 13 Tips to Help You Fight a Slasher Villain

Any serious slasher movie fan knows the basic rules, enforced by the Scream franchise, of how to survive a horror flick. Don't have sex, don't say "I'll be back," et cetera. That's fine and dandy, but what about something more practical? Especially when one's directly facing off with the killer? Well, here are thirteen tips on how to make it out alive if going toe-to-toe with a slasher villain. Use with caution!

1. Use your mind
If you know you can't win physically, use your brain to outsmart your opponent. They're probably not a genius to begin with.

(Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood)

2. Use their tools against them
More than likely, a slasher villain has some kind of weapon. If you can use it against them, do so.

(The Silent Scream)
3. Catch them off guard
Take advantage if the killer is attacking someone else. Not only will you save your peer, but you can also take your opponent out. Be sure to use the business end of whatever weapon your brandishing, though. Knocking them out with a blunt end isn't enough.

(Prom Night)
4. Prey on their clumsiness
Most slashers villains are human, and humans can be clumsy. Unless you're dealing with a former Olympian, you can count on the killer slipping up or tripping every so often.

(Hide and Go Shriek)
5. Take them for a ride
If you eventually manage to get your car started, don't just drive away - run that killer over. Now, if the killer is already in your car, they are likely not wearing a seatbelt. Hit that accelerator and then come to a screeching halt. Let gravity do the rest.

(Urban Legend)
6. Use their momentum against them
The martial art of jujutsu partly focuses on using your enemy's momentum against them. If the killer is jumping at you, toss them over your shoulder. Works even better if you're near a balcony or high window.

(Cherry Falls)
7. Use your environment
More than likely, you will be led into a setting that is not of your choice. Recognize where you are and look for whatever is handy. If you're in a hospital, find some scalpels. Stuck at a summer camp? There's got to be a wood chopping axe somewhere.

(Dr. Giggles)
8. Subdue them
You may not be able to kill your enemy for whatever reason. That doesn't mean you can't do whatever it takes to immobilize them until help arrives.

(When a Stranger Calls)
Rarely does a slasher villain survive being set on fire. Well, except that one guy in the ugly Christmas sweater. If you have some accelerant and a match or lighter, get to it.

10. Shut them up
Don't let them lull you into a conversation. No one has time to hear them unravel their Scooby-Doo monologue or hear their life story. Just get out of there.

(Just Before Dawn)
11. Tap into their emotions
A slasher killer has emotions like anyone else, and sometimes you can use those against them.

(Friday the 13th Part 2)
12. Off with their head
It's pretty hard to function without a head. Self-explanatory.

(The Final Girls)
13. Finish the job
No matter how you fight, just make sure that slasher is dead. You can never be too cautious.

(I Still Know What You Did Last Summer)

This poll is closed.

Do you know self-defense or any martial arts?

I would like to learn
I'm a lover, not a fighter

Have you even been in a physical fight, ONTD?

[Other entries in my ONTD Original™ - Halloween Edition series]
  • Current Music: Gloria Gaynor - I Will Survive