Jon Stewart Blasts Congress For Being Just Like Justin Bieber

Jon Stewart said on Wednesday night's Daily Show that he would be covering two equally serious, related stories: The recently approved deal with Iran, and the recent police raid of Justin Bieber's home. It's a weightier episode than that suggests.

He started with the Bieber raid: After a neighbor accused Bieber of causing $20,000 worth of damage by egging his house, police went to the pop star's mansion with a warrant. Bieber wasn't arrested, but a rapper-collaborator, Lil Za, was. "Boy, isn't that the American system of justice?" Stewart said. "White guy breaks some shit. Cops come and take the black guy away."

After a kind-of creepy interlude in which Stewart fantasizes about wrapping Bieber's smooth chest around him like a kimono, he eventually got back on topic. The deal with Iran is a huge deal, Stewart said, opening diplomatic relations between Washington and Tehran for the first time in 35 years and ensuring that Iran doesn't develop nuclear weapons — that is unless somebody "figuratively throws eggs at the entire thing."

And there's the connection. The Senate is poised to blow up the nuclear deal by slapping new sanctions on Iran, clearing a bill passed in the House last summer. "Congress is the Justin Bieber of our government," Stewart explained: For no reason whatsoever, they're "throwing away a tremendous opportunity because of immaturity and a lack of self-control."

France, Britain, Russia, China, Germany, and Iran have all agreed to the deal, so what's Congress' problem? Stewart asked. For Republicans, the answer is easy: Not only would they oppose anything Obama is in favor of, even the "Orgasms Cure Cancer Act," he said, but apparently for the GOP "sanctions are the tax cuts of foreign policy: It's always the right answer."

Stewart was most baffled, though, by the 16 Senate Democrats who have joined the 43 Republicans in formally signing on to the new-sanctions bill. What are those Democrats thinking? Stewart's answer, via former Rep. Jane Harman (D-Calif.): Basically, Israel. Israel is currently lobbing insults at U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry, he added, but Iran's saying some dumb stuff, too. "Are there any foreign power more mature than these guys that we can deal with?" he asked.

Stewart spent the rest of the show talking with former Defense Secretary Robert Gates. It's an interesting conversation, with Gates saying that America is too quick to use force abroad, decrying the partisan "cherry-picking" of quotes from his new book, Duty, and trash-talking Congress.

source | video outside the u.s.