ONTD

10:55 am - 08/15/2006

Jessica Simpson says Ex-Husband had a small you know what!

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Jessica Simpson has been quoted by Times magazine saying "Nick Lachey didn't pack too well if you know what I mean, but I got over it." Now by just looking at Nick Lachey, I could easily tell he doesn't pack much under the belt. He has the good looks, good body, he is rich and he can sing. These traits can only lead to him having a small penis, it would not be fair if he got all those traits and then some, you get where I am going with this? Wait, there is more.

On August 1st, 2006(2 days ago) Jessica Simpson was once again quoted saying more 'trash' about her ex-husband, she was quoted saying, "Nick's small package was a problem sometimes, like the first time we had sex, to tell you the truth, I didn't really feel much, I faked the whole thing, I really felt sorry for him, I still loved him though." This is trully sad, I really hope Nick Lachey can back himself up from these rumors, they just keep coming, but, not to worry, with all the money he has, am sure he will think of a way to get back on 'top'.

source:celebrityfan.net
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exit_halo 15th-Aug-2006 09:37 am (UTC)
What a bitch.
dethroned 15th-Aug-2006 10:32 am (UTC)
You took the words right out of my mouth...or keyboard.
oddcharms 15th-Aug-2006 11:18 am (UTC)
my thoughts exactly
scottage_cheese 15th-Aug-2006 12:03 pm (UTC)
fucking WORD>
sweetnitanitro 15th-Aug-2006 12:10 pm (UTC)
Totally.
hollsh 15th-Aug-2006 12:27 pm (UTC)
exactly!

she's so white trash!
apricothips 15th-Aug-2006 12:38 pm (UTC)
haha you stole the words right out of my mouth.
shutthefugup 15th-Aug-2006 12:59 pm (UTC)
Totally.
celica18l 15th-Aug-2006 02:11 pm (UTC)
lol exactly what I said outloud
agateway 15th-Aug-2006 03:24 pm (UTC)
agreed!
_angellily_ 15th-Aug-2006 04:25 pm (UTC)
You know I always thought she was. But that just puts it over the top.
sistershotgun 15th-Aug-2006 04:43 pm (UTC)
+1
macaroni1213 15th-Aug-2006 05:04 pm (UTC)
Amen. And all my friends can't understand why I don't like her.
hot143chocolate 15th-Aug-2006 05:07 pm (UTC)
I was just about to type that!
xdecadentx 15th-Aug-2006 07:52 pm (UTC)
and then some
_omgteaparty 15th-Aug-2006 08:50 pm (UTC)
ya, seriously.
_girllyzilla 16th-Aug-2006 12:43 am (UTC)
agreed!
celtic_thistle 16th-Aug-2006 01:58 am (UTC)
I was just going to say that.
prittty1npink 17th-Aug-2006 08:59 am (UTC)
Seriously! Dear Jessica, just because you have big tits does't mean you can just lie there and expect to have mind-blowing sex and come ten times. I'm sure Nick had exactly the same thoughts about you: BAD IN BED!
surfhus 15th-Aug-2006 09:39 am (UTC)
could she get any lower?
privatelyricist 15th-Aug-2006 12:54 pm (UTC)
than on her knees?
allthatjazz_01 15th-Aug-2006 01:24 pm (UTC)
Nope. Sad, Jess. Really. Little man jokes are soooo high school.
mlefilips mlefilips15th-Aug-2006 09:39 am (UTC)
LMAO..... maybe nick will post pictures of his peen to back his package up.
stellamare Re: mlefilips15th-Aug-2006 05:06 pm (UTC)
oh dear lord I hope not!
amyannosu Re: mlefilips16th-Aug-2006 01:23 am (UTC)
LOL I HOPE!
dejamort 15th-Aug-2006 09:39 am (UTC)
Now, see, this is just sad how she has to resort to talking about Nick's manhood. Just because he broke her record on the singles chart, and has a better single out. Seriously. Get a life, bimbo.
redangelteflon Jessica's Bitter Pill! lol since Nick has Upgraded to Vanessa Minillo!15th-Aug-2006 09:40 am (UTC)
Jessica's so sad and pathetic these days! lol

I doubt any of it is true since it's coming from such
a bitter hag like her
she's just trying to make herself feel better because she's no longer
the media darling
and Upstaged by one Miss Minillo
elliottsherman Re: Jessica's Bitter Pill! lol since Nick has Upgraded to Vanessa Minillo!15th-Aug-2006 09:53 am (UTC)
your prose reminds me of rosie o'donnell.
lastholiday Re: Jessica's Bitter Pill! lol since Nick has Upgraded to Vanessa Minillo!15th-Aug-2006 10:03 am (UTC)
iawtc
redangelteflon Re: Jessica's Bitter Pill! lol since Nick has Upgraded to Vanessa Minillo!15th-Aug-2006 10:08 am (UTC)
I don't know about that.
At least my post is coherent and I know how to use punctuation.
Rosie's blog looks like a jumble of half and miss-formed Haikus.
sly_drag Re: Jessica's Bitter Pill! lol since Nick has Upgraded to Vanessa Minillo!15th-Aug-2006 06:05 pm (UTC)
what's with all the random line breaks? :S
mashka_tyt 15th-Aug-2006 09:40 am (UTC)
lets pretend like it's a "real true story"
xxxyinpink 15th-Aug-2006 09:41 am (UTC)
maybe she just has a really big vajayjay
shikinluv 15th-Aug-2006 09:59 am (UTC)
eww, visual.
galtogien 15th-Aug-2006 10:27 am (UTC)
ditto
editjournal 15th-Aug-2006 12:22 pm (UTC)
It probably got that way after Johnny Knoxville fisted her for days on end.
verrelisse 15th-Aug-2006 12:27 pm (UTC)
HAHA, I am eerily amused by your icon... I just keep thinking about what a tool Britney made herself look like in that interview...
lickerishgrl 15th-Aug-2006 11:07 pm (UTC)
had she really been a virgin....how would she know his penis was small...who would she have compared it to?
bogie_bacall 15th-Aug-2006 09:45 am (UTC)
This is why I like divorces.
entropicaly 15th-Aug-2006 09:55 am (UTC)
lmao ditto
bethknit11 15th-Aug-2006 07:26 pm (UTC)
LOL. and this is why i love ONTD and celebs and gossip. i don't even give a shit if it's true or not!
hatsumomo 15th-Aug-2006 09:46 am (UTC)
Tacky tacky tacky.

It's pathetic when people say shit like this.
sita_moonlight 15th-Aug-2006 09:48 am (UTC)
It's horrible that she stoops so low that she talks about the size of her ex husband's penis. But, you know, people in hollywood don't know what the word privacy means.
horror_mistress 15th-Aug-2006 09:50 am (UTC)
BITCH.
shutthefugup 15th-Aug-2006 01:01 pm (UTC)
Your icon is adorable!
horror_mistress 15th-Aug-2006 01:05 pm (UTC)
thanks :D
_musicfreak_ 15th-Aug-2006 09:50 am (UTC)
I seriously doubt that she said that.
But who knows. It's Jessica we're talking about.
superpchan 15th-Aug-2006 09:51 am (UTC)
Sounds fake.
mixman001 15th-Aug-2006 01:08 pm (UTC)
seriously. In the first quote she starts off by saying 'nick lachey--his full name, why would she even bother saying that? I think this is all very fake fake fake
kyxie 15th-Aug-2006 09:52 am (UTC)
I can sympathise. No one likes a small dick.
elcorazonde 15th-Aug-2006 09:55 am (UTC)
I don't know.. I've had a boyfriend who was small.. and there was no problems there.

I also had a boyfriend who was 9 1/2" hard. I could not do a damn thing with it. (no fun)

I'd rather not have a guy who's hung like a horse. I think it depends on how the guy works it..
kyxie 15th-Aug-2006 10:03 am (UTC)
I've had a giant penis-man as well and didn't enjoy myself one bit, and I've been with guys with tiny pricks and haven't enjoyed it either.

I just like them large, not enormous, jesus.
newyorkdoll 15th-Aug-2006 11:09 am (UTC)
I agree my ex was tiny but it workeddddddddddd
courtney_77 15th-Aug-2006 12:10 pm (UTC)
Agreed...It's a total letdown.
lucy_u2 15th-Aug-2006 03:02 pm (UTC)
No one? uh, I prefer small cocks.
messdupnperfct 15th-Aug-2006 03:16 pm (UTC)
lol, i like them small
isisfrog 15th-Aug-2006 11:30 pm (UTC)
Even is the tongue is smokin'? :P
lenchik 16th-Aug-2006 03:38 am (UTC)
That's what I was thinking. Not "Omg she's such a bitch, omg how can she say that?" This story is probably false anyway....but either way, small dicks are a huge let-down. I mean, sometimes it *can* work if he knows how to please you, tries hard, and you're generally attracted to the guy, but blah.

Nothing enourmous, but nothing tiny either please.
volvocowgirl99 15th-Aug-2006 09:54 am (UTC)
yeah right, i really don't believe she said that. do you?!
tooimpurenangel 15th-Aug-2006 01:36 pm (UTC)
I totally do. She's disgusting!
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