"I did not look as much like Pamela Anderson as I had hoped I would."
– Kristen Bell, on donning a similar Baywatch red swimsuit for her new movie The Lifeguard, to Vanity Fair
"Look at me doing all the talking while you sit there doing nothing. I feel like I'm cohosting the Oscars with you."
– Seth Rogen, poking fun at pal James Franco during his Comedy Central roast, via EW
"70's porn called. It wants its vibe back. Immediately."
– Behati Prinsloo, who posted a nearly naked photo of fiancé Adam Levine on Instagram
"It's really kind of amazing the powers that this man has. I mean I was actually becoming a little submissive myself."
– Josh Duhamel, who enlisted the help of Dog Whisperer Cesar Millan to help dachshund Zoe prepare for her new brother, on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno
"Hashtag get over it ..."
– Liam Payne, when asked about Taylor Swift's MTV VMAs jab towards One Direction bandmate Harry Styles, to Vulture
"I always hope that I'll know when I no longer need to show my breasts for good. Like I'll know when to pack it in and put a bra on. That is my prayer to the universe."
– Lena Dunham, on when she'll be able to cover up on the small screen, to Marie Claire UK
"And Oprah, my girl, she can act."
– President Barack Obama, giving accolades to The Butler star (and good pal) Oprah Winfrey, in a radio interview with the Tom Joyner Morning Show
"If you speak to most women, they want to take me home and mother me rather than take me to bed."
– Singer-songwriter Ed Sheeran, on the attention from his female fans, to PEOPLE
"You know, he's not playing King Lear. It's Batman!"
– Matt Damon, defending longtime friend Ben Affleck's controversial casting as the new Batman, to the Times of India
"I was not expecting her to be putting her butt that close to my son. The problem is now I can never 'unsee' it."
– Crooner Robin Thicke's mom, Gloria Loring, on Miley Cyrus's performance at the MTV VMAs, to Yahoo omg! Insider
Which celeb had THE BEST quote this week?
HAPPY THREE DAY WEEKEND, ONTD! :-) And another school year begins....