ONTD

1:21 pm - 02/13/2013

Next 3 Chuck Palahniuk Novels Announced



Publishers Marketplace dropped the news earlier this month that Chuck Palahniuk sold the rights to his next two books, as well as signed a deal in the wake of the Haunted movie adaptation finally getting its greenlight. In other words, this is a very good time to be a fan of Chuck Palahniuk.

So I figured it was high time we do our own "State of the Union" here at The Cult with a summary of what's in the store for fans of Chuck.
Doomed (Oct 8, 2013)</b>: Chuck's next novel is a sequel to his 2012 novel Damned. Here's the description Chuck gave me:

The next novel will follow Madison back to earth as a ghost, doomed to haunting her parents for a year. In flashback we see her earlier childhood, including the death of the kitten whose dead body subsequently clogged the plumbing of the Beverly-Wilshire Hotel. That death is not Madison's doing, but another death is. Whether it's murder or self-defense, as a ten-year-old Madison kills someone horrifically, and that's the most-likely reason why she was damned in the first place. We also begin to recognize a centuries-long conspiracy engineered to train and test Maddy for her role as the savior of all spiritual beings.

Nope, nothing subtle, here.

Oh, I forgot to mention it but the world ends in this next book.


October 8th may seem way off, but the good folks at Amazon already have the book listed for pre-order.

Beautiful You (October, 2014): Next year we get Beautiful You. The Publishers Marketplace articled listed it as a book "focusing on the apocalyptic marketing possibilities of feminine pleasure." Then in a recent email, Chuck gave me his own personal description of it:

It's a comic/erotic thriller, a mash-up of 'mommy porn' and chick lit such as Sex and the City, and fantasy lit like Clan of the Cave Bear. Imagine if Ira Levin had a baby with Jean Auel.

It's safe to say I am flipping out over this book. Chuck has promised to reveal more on this one soon, so stay tuned.

Make Something Up (October, 2015): Yep, Chuck's prolific style of writing has given us a telescope to see two years in advance. And so in October 2015, we get Make Something Up, a new collection of short stories, many of which have previously appeared in Playboy.

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drcorton 13th-Feb-2013 10:54 pm (UTC)
I can't get into his stuff anymore idk why. I lovedddddd Invisible Monsters.
avvien 13th-Feb-2013 11:00 pm (UTC)
the last thing i tried reading from him was pygmy and promptly tapped out.
redaodai 13th-Feb-2013 11:07 pm (UTC)
I liked IM, too.
sarahvma 13th-Feb-2013 11:40 pm (UTC)
THIS. I think he became the McDonalds of authors (now that Stephen King is winding down) and the pressure to put out a book every year sapped him of original ideas.
chickenpyp 14th-Feb-2013 12:06 am (UTC)
stephen king is putting out a sequel to the shining this year i think
nathanandbarry 14th-Feb-2013 03:50 am (UTC)
yep. he started out so well and now it's quantity over quality.
myblackass 14th-Feb-2013 12:02 am (UTC)
I feel the same way. I haven't enjoyed any of his recent stuff.
_lackof_passion 15th-Feb-2013 12:41 am (UTC)
I can't either. They just started to be all to similar for me (i think.)
ediesedgwick 13th-Feb-2013 10:54 pm (UTC)
~Intellectual~ high schoolers rejoice
chandyland11 13th-Feb-2013 10:58 pm (UTC)
lmao mte
screw_jack 13th-Feb-2013 11:03 pm (UTC)
LOL hey now. we all had dat phase.
whiskybars 13th-Feb-2013 11:11 pm (UTC)
lol yes but we all been there
spartacus 13th-Feb-2013 11:26 pm (UTC)
never read his books lol
youdontknowher 13th-Feb-2013 11:27 pm (UTC)
ngl Lullaby really did open my eyes up to humans spreading invasive species in 8th grade...
no_urges 13th-Feb-2013 11:39 pm (UTC)
lmao mteeee

(and college students...my bff's ex-boyfriend loved his shit)
goofusgallant 14th-Feb-2013 02:11 am (UTC)
lol
justpeachythnks 15th-Feb-2013 12:06 am (UTC)
lmao mte i have such an irrational hatred for chuck palaniuck and i think it might be internalised rage towards my pretentious as hell 14 year old self
chickenpyp 13th-Feb-2013 10:56 pm (UTC)
yawn
rainbow_fish 13th-Feb-2013 10:58 pm (UTC)
It's a comic/erotic thriller, a mash-up of 'mommy porn' and chick lit such as Sex and the City, and fantasy lit like Clan of the Cave Bear. Imagine if Ira Levin had a baby with Jean Auel.


Lmao what in the actual fuck.
xmas_n_hollis 14th-Feb-2013 01:05 am (UTC)
Seriously though. i used to enjoy hiswork but recently itd like his stories are weird for the sake of being bizarre instead of actually making sense
gpin2084 13th-Feb-2013 10:58 pm (UTC)
helloooo eleventh grade.
chandyland11 13th-Feb-2013 10:59 pm (UTC)
maria0305 13th-Feb-2013 11:00 pm (UTC)
i loved him. i loved him so much. so much that i have a quote from one of his books tattooed on me. but i'm *still* struggling to get through "Damned". This next one doesn't sound like a step in the right direction... Sighhh.
usagidropicons 14th-Feb-2013 12:33 am (UTC)
Really? I loved Damned, its his first novel in a while that I've enjoyed.
babbss 13th-Feb-2013 11:01 pm (UTC)
It was only recently that I knew how to say his last name correctly lol. I always thought it was pah-la-nyuk but then it's actually paw-la-nick. Oops.
imkevinspacey 13th-Feb-2013 11:37 pm (UTC)
omg no?
screw_jack 13th-Feb-2013 11:04 pm (UTC)
I used to read and reread Lullaby all the time (high school dayz); part of me still wishes they made that into a film.
whiskybars 13th-Feb-2013 11:05 pm (UTC)
why? we don't need any, thanks
verystefunny 13th-Feb-2013 11:05 pm (UTC)
he's working an odd mix of sufjan stevens and steve carell in that picture and it's making me a little uncomfortable b/c i don't wanna find him attractive
aflaminghalo 13th-Feb-2013 11:29 pm (UTC)
Lol, I just came in here to see if anyone else was thinking he looked good...
squalor 13th-Feb-2013 11:06 pm (UTC)
never read any of his stuff

should i bother
chickenpyp 13th-Feb-2013 11:09 pm (UTC)
lol no

well i guess it would depend if you are a 12 year old rebel or not

Edited at 2013-02-13 11:09 pm (UTC)
lestat 13th-Feb-2013 11:11 pm (UTC)
fight club and invisible monsters = his best work
whiskybars 13th-Feb-2013 11:16 pm (UTC)
if you're past 18, then no
squalor 13th-Feb-2013 11:21 pm (UTC)
lmao i'm turning 30 in may so i guess i missed the boat
jeterluva 14th-Feb-2013 12:18 am (UTC)
I liked Survivor and Invisible Monsters.
deathbytamarind 14th-Feb-2013 12:55 am (UTC)
I really enjoyed Fight Club.
nathanandbarry 14th-Feb-2013 03:52 am (UTC)
Fight Club is
sandvich 13th-Feb-2013 11:07 pm (UTC)
He seems like a nice guy irl and I'm glad that he's managed to keep it together with all the awful stuff that's happened to him, but output-wise I feel like he disappeared up his own ass between Survivor and Choke. Even my aggressively nonconformist thirteen-year-old self couldn't pick up another one of his books after the boring shockfest that was Haunted.
egalitarianmuse 13th-Feb-2013 11:11 pm (UTC)
I've been trying to finish Haunted for three years. I end up more disturbed than entertained every time. Gotdamn it, that flashback about the police station dolls! Yeah, no. I tried to get past it and never quite managed.

Edited at 2013-02-13 11:11 pm (UTC)
uledy 13th-Feb-2013 11:18 pm (UTC)
I will be honest, I've read all of his work EXCEPT Haunted...I've tried so hard, but my god....
imkevinspacey 13th-Feb-2013 11:38 pm (UTC)
Haunted was horrendously stilted.
ohwutevernvm 13th-Feb-2013 11:42 pm (UTC)
oh man, i tried to read that book but didn't get to past it to finish. maybe i could reread when i get a chance? mm...
rhapsodeeinblue 13th-Feb-2013 11:09 pm (UTC)
Omgggggggg

Invisible Monsters is one of my favorite books ever. If it ever gets turned into a movie I will rage.

eta: nhft hate in this post tbh.

Edited at 2013-02-13 11:10 pm (UTC)
uledy 13th-Feb-2013 11:15 pm (UTC)
Thank-you. I don't know what's up with all these elitists writing off his work as pre-teen angst fodder.
chickenpyp 13th-Feb-2013 11:17 pm (UTC)
there's nothing really angst ridden about it, it's just that he uses the shock value thing too much (with no real rhyme or reason for it) and teenagers eat that shit up because it's ~edgy~
amanda_aces 13th-Feb-2013 11:22 pm (UTC)
They have been talking about a movie for years with Jessica Biel as Brandy/Shannon/Shane. JESSICA BIEL. JEEESSSIICAAAA BIIIEEELLLL.
It needs to stay in development hell.
Like, can you imagine Jessica Biel delivering some of those Brandy's more melodramatic lines? Christ.
pinkimartini 13th-Feb-2013 11:09 pm (UTC)
I don't know how I feel about "Beautiful You" - but seeing that Chuck wrote it then it has to be good, right? Right?
egalitarianmuse 13th-Feb-2013 11:12 pm (UTC)
Don't fall for it! Wait for someone else to read it and post a review on GoodReads, then if you feel reassured, try it for yourself.
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