2:43 pm - 11/28/2012

The Walking Dead’s zombie bikini calendar went horribly, horribly wrong

The tagline for this season of The Walking Dead has been "Fight the dead, fear the living." It's a particularly apt phrase when you see the "zombie bikini calendar" a South African ad agency made to promote TWD, because I genuinely fear whatever human being thought of, approved and then created this disaster.

The problem is that unlike this tongue-in-cheek Zombie Pin-up calendar from 2010, the makers of this TWD calendar are actually trying to produce something sexy. Let me repeat that: The makers of this calendar are trying, on purpose, to make supposedly dead women look genuinely attractive. So they're fighting an uphill battle to begin with.

Second, they're clearly working with a tight budget, because the wounds created are entirely superficial. There are no exposed bones, no gaping cuts, no missing limbs - just a few scrapes, bruises and lacerations. They don't actually look like zombies at all. They look like they've been badly beaten.

So this isn't a "zombie bikini calendar" at all. It's a "savagely beaten bikini model calendar" that happens to have "The Walking Dead" and its South African premiere date, time and channel at the top of every page. It is completely fucked.

You can download the free calendar here, although I sincerely hope it will be to look aghast at its contents, and then pass around to your friends so they can see how awful it is. Although I will say to the calendar's credit that they bothered - barely - to photoshop the models' eyes so they vaguely look like zombies. Because the models didn't wear any contacts in the actual photo shoot. How do I know?

BECAUSE OF THE VIDEO. THAT THEY SHOT. ON PURPOSE. OF THEM PHOTOGRAPHING WOMEN COVERED IN FLESH WOUNDS WHILE WEARING BIKINIS. If you think the calendar is disturbing, wait til you watch these girls pout and frolic on the beach, covered in bruises and minor wounds, without the barest semblance of zombie-ness.

I'll tell you this: I honestly didn't think the Governor's near-rape of Maggie on last Sunday's episode would be the second most misogynistic thing The Walking Dead would do this week.


Merciful Sagan, what the fuck....I CANNOT
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mrcelebrity 28th-Nov-2012 10:55 pm (UTC)
soba_kasu 28th-Nov-2012 11:19 pm (UTC)
im_chris_hansen 28th-Nov-2012 11:37 pm (UTC)
flashnights 28th-Nov-2012 11:57 pm (UTC)
natywentz 29th-Nov-2012 12:47 am (UTC)
mjspice 29th-Nov-2012 02:02 pm (UTC)
I can't...
lost_in_the_zoo 28th-Nov-2012 10:55 pm (UTC)
die2nitelive4ev 28th-Nov-2012 11:02 pm (UTC)
A lot of people in the Gothic/ rockabilly culture like women in zombie make up and find it sexy. I've never understood it but some of my exes have digged those photoshoots
vee_bot 28th-Nov-2012 11:06 pm (UTC)
I've seen that kind of stuff, and usually it's more campy / pin-up esq to me. Like a halloween costume sort of. This is just like straight up bikini girls that look beaten up.
ladyofmachinery 28th-Nov-2012 11:06 pm (UTC)
ugh this is gross
burningpumpkins 29th-Nov-2012 04:29 pm (UTC)
Guys who like beating women, misogynists... Etc
littlehayzay 28th-Nov-2012 10:56 pm (UTC)
This is so incredibly creepy and fucked up. 'Hey, let's make a calendar. Of zombies... wait, no.. let's make a bunch of models look like they got the crap beaten out of them and then have them prance around a beach in Old Navy bikinis'

Edited at 2012-11-28 10:57 pm (UTC)
queenoftea 28th-Nov-2012 10:56 pm (UTC)
What the fuck
vee_bot 28th-Nov-2012 10:57 pm (UTC)
whaaaaaat the fuck were they thinking
saintsmarching 28th-Nov-2012 11:06 pm (UTC)
Whoa, I was scrolling fast and only saw face near ass and was like "what kind of porn gif... oh".
hera_bearrra 28th-Nov-2012 11:14 pm (UTC)
bienenkiste 28th-Nov-2012 11:31 pm (UTC)
frootums 29th-Nov-2012 11:54 am (UTC)
Nice Icon ;D
mjspice 29th-Nov-2012 02:04 pm (UTC)
luminaris 29th-Nov-2012 04:53 am (UTC)
It looks like they're about to have sex here
rainbow_fish 28th-Nov-2012 10:59 pm (UTC)
This brings the Ryan Gosling quotation to mind- when he was talking about the NC-17 rating for Blue Valentine and he was like 'it's okay to showcase violence and harm to women, but give a woman pleasure, and that's pornography.'

in the sense women who look like they are domestic violence victims are supposed to be ~sexy~ here.
sparkysparky 28th-Nov-2012 11:01 pm (UTC)
preach it
ilouboutin 28th-Nov-2012 11:02 pm (UTC)
i've seen BV about 5 times and i still dont understand the NC-17 rating.
frklphace 28th-Nov-2012 11:18 pm (UTC)
CUNNILINGUS IS BAD! BAD! Don't teach the young girls that getting their pussy eaten is FUCKING FANTASTIC!
babycnessa 28th-Nov-2012 11:03 pm (UTC)
die2nitelive4ev 28th-Nov-2012 11:04 pm (UTC)
same with the Batman franchise. The dark knight should have had a much higher rating for the horror/violence but if there was one Batmanbutt it was have got it.
starrika 28th-Nov-2012 11:10 pm (UTC)
Things like that make me love him even more. Preach it.
chuk_is_dazzled 28th-Nov-2012 11:11 pm (UTC)
hera_bearrra 28th-Nov-2012 11:15 pm (UTC)
fauxparadiso 28th-Nov-2012 11:01 pm (UTC)
This is too pathetic to even be bothered over.
hera_bearrra 28th-Nov-2012 11:15 pm (UTC)
Cute icon

Edited at 2012-11-28 11:16 pm (UTC)
liliananyappy 28th-Nov-2012 11:03 pm (UTC)
butterbuns 28th-Nov-2012 11:04 pm (UTC)
Man, if they actually looked like zombies, I'd be all over that.

This is just gross.
saintsmarching 28th-Nov-2012 11:08 pm (UTC)
If they looked like the zombies in WD actually do, I'd maybe be amused for two seconds. But lbr, it'd still be pretty weird.
butterbuns 28th-Nov-2012 11:09 pm (UTC)
tbh it's the weird factor that would make me get it. Mostly because it'd bother the hell out of my mother. Heh.
duckyduck92 28th-Nov-2012 11:05 pm (UTC)
but, why? how would this make you want to watch the show?

btw I watched love actually the other day and my ovaries exploded when I realized it was rick in the cue cards scene.
babycnessa 28th-Nov-2012 11:05 pm (UTC)
mrcelebrity 28th-Nov-2012 11:07 pm (UTC)
That gif should have the infinity symbol tbh
ladyofmachinery 28th-Nov-2012 11:08 pm (UTC)
lol YES
mend 28th-Nov-2012 11:05 pm (UTC)
meth addicts will be all over this
ladyofmachinery 28th-Nov-2012 11:08 pm (UTC)
I legit thought it was a meth addict calendar before I read the title. Then I clicked and it looked like they were beaten up. Whatever the case, these girls do NOT look like zombies wtf
roguedandelion 28th-Nov-2012 11:06 pm (UTC)
Well that jumped the shark. And then had sex with it's corpse.
fotografa 29th-Nov-2012 01:45 am (UTC)
You made me spit out my drink! I needed a good laugh.
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