Kotaku, Sexist Male Gamers, Grand Theft Auto and the Idea of a Female Protagonist: A Hot Damn Mess
Someone did, and it was a hot mess.
In this Kotaku article, Orionsangel, made this comment:
It got a slew of comments, with most things one would expect of Kotaku (where I, myself, got into tiresome discussions about sexism and homophobia): shit, shit, and more shit.
Here are some of the highlights.
A similar argument was used for why a female assassin like Aveline from Assassin's Creed: Liberation doesn't make any god damn sense. Because, you know...video games are supposed to be realistic.
Left: A rare, historic picture of infamous Grigori Rasputin who had made a pact with demon-god Asmodeus.
Right: Fake person of fiction, Patty Something
Boobies and vagina is what it all boils down to? I can't believe I've never figured out why we should have more female characters! Oh, my word! ~the more you know~
If a woman is tough in real life, that's just unnatural. Seeing it on film or video games is a fucking travesty.
Pictured above: Little-known homemaker adjusting her new
~European~ style hand vacuum cleaner
And then, these:
This bullshit from some loser named starmand1
I see a lot of reasons why Rockstar won't feature a female lead in GTA.
- They'd have to code in her monthly cycle, so a lot of the swimming gameplay would be inaccessible for a week, which might turn a lot of players off (unless they add reactionary sharks). Then she'd be cranky during that time, which might affect a lot of the game's dialog to go against what the player wants to actually say.
- They'd have to change the vehicle physics to better simulate sucky driving.
- The kitchens in each home location would have to include a working stove; plus, a laundry room would need to be added (as well as walk-in closets).
- The romance feature would need a pregnancy system, which would include percentage chances for miscarriages. Then they'd have to worry about an abortion system. Zikes! Apparently, romance was already cut, though.
- The weapons system would need to include Nerf products, because having a woman fire an RPG would instantly turn her into a rag doll.
- Every time a slo-mo vehicle jump occurred, they'd have to implement high-pitched screaming.
- The cell phone UI would require a Hello Kitty license (very expensive these days).
- Every other store would have to sell clothes, which takes away from creating aesthetic variety.
- The player would still get lost despite the GPS system.
- They'd have to create a "mother" character, so that the player always has someone who will take their call.
- They'd have to add a cell phone version of GTA V in the player's cell phone, since she'll be spending a lot of time on it.
- They'd have to record a "crying" version of every line of her dialog. Some voice actors can charge up to a $1000/hour, and you know she'd have 10 times the amount of dialog of a male character.
- They'd have to add side jobs, such as: babysitter, elementary school teacher, waitress, receptionist, administrative assistant, and stay-at-home-mom. All of these are very honorable and relevant jobs, but difficult to extract fun gameplay.
- They'd have to fill the word with parodies of Twilight and The Hunger Games.
- Lastly, the "wanted level" system would need a complete makeover. 1 Star: the player hears random cat calls from wandering pedestrians. 2 Stars: accidental groping and upskirt cell phone cam attempts. 3 Stars: sexting and schlong pics from unwanted sources. 4 Stars: sexual assaults. 5 Stars: sexual assaults from the authority figures who you think would save you from the 4 Star advancements. 6 Stars: immaculate conception.
As you can see, this would be a major undertaking; one that would mostly certainly delay the game well into 2014. So I feel Rockstar made a wise decision in keeping the protagonists as male characters. Hopefully, you feel the same way, too. Girls rule!
Sadly, the people who were supportive of the idea were in the minority.
Fuck this series. Saints Row is the shit.
Dad mods Wind Waker to make Link a girl (by changing pronouns within game) for his daughter. Kotaku commenters call dad close minded/sexist/etc.