ONTD

1. How Did Ash Know He Was Supposed To Bring Back The Xenomorph? (Alien 1979)

The Weland Yutani Corporation made the sneaky move of switching out the original science officer for Ash (Ian Holm) right before the Nostromo’s departure. Ash is eventually revealed to be an android whose actual purpose on the ship is to ensure the survival of the Xenomorph for (one would assume) further research and possibly weaponizing. But how did he know that was what he was supposed to do?

Early on in the film we’re given clues to his deceptive nature. He breaks protocol to let in Kane (John Hurt) after he’s been attacked by the Face Hugger. He then spends the rest of the film trying to ensure the organism’s survival until it can be brought back to Earth. Once subdued Ash then reveals that his ultimate objective was “bring back life form. Priority One. All other priorities rescinded.”

Based on what we know from Prometheus, the Weyland side of the Weyland Yutani Corporation was aware and interested in other life in the universe so it would make sense that their androids would have a built-in order to bring back other life forms at the expense of the crew. Like in The Simpson when the Krusty doll’s switch is set to evil. The Corporation could potentially have a mandate that an android with that mission be supplied on every ship lest they hear an unknown signal. They just didn’t count on resident bad-ass Ripley being on board.


2. Why Is The Puzzle Box So Easy To Open? (Hellraiser series 1987–2005)

The Hellraiser series centres on a mysterious puzzle box (revealed in the sequels to be The Lament Configuration) which, when opened, unleashes the Cenobites led by the iconic Pinhead (Doug Bradley) upon the opener. Much is made about how hard it is to open the damn box which would make sense as the person would really have to want to experience the dark pleasures of Hell to open it, right? From what the films show, however, all you need to do is press down on the circle shape on the box, and then the box opens itself. Despite how many times the films insist on the box being hard to open it seems that if I left the box in a preschool the Cenobites would be sticking around for snack time.

This problem actually becomes more prevalent in the sequel Hellraiser II: Hellbound. In the original Hellraiser we see Frank and Kristy open the box without too much fuss. The second film opens with Pinhead’s human self opening the box without too much fuss so why oh why does the eeeeeeeeeeevil Dr. Channard (Kenneth Cranham)need the institutionalized Tiffany who is a whiz at puzzles to open it? He couldn’t have done it? A doctor who when to medical school (albeit an eeeeeeeeeevil medical school) who’s been researching it his whole life couldn’t have opened it? Let alone the hapless simpletons who manage to open it in the sequels?

The possible answer lies in the box’s history. Built by a toymaker Philip Lemarchand for the Duc de L’Isle an aristocrat and master of the dark arts (aren’t they all?) to open a gateway to Hell and enslave a demon the Lament Configuration was made to order for one specific person and not intended for mass consumption. My theory is, the Duc de L’Isle was as dumb as a post. When you’re hired to make something you have to please your audience. If your audience is an inbred French aristocrat then chances are having a big shiny button to open the gateway to Hell is an unspoken requirement.

Anyone remember Adam Scott in Hellraiser: Bloodline? Or how about Henry Cavill in Hellraiser: Hellworld? :P


3. Were MacReady and Blair Infected? (The Thing 1982)

This is possibly one of the best endings in a genre film because it puts the audience in the same position as its characters; they don’t know who to trust. After surviving shape-shifting alien attack on their Antarctic base MacReady (Kurt Russell) and Childs (Keith David) await their fate of freezing to death with a bottle of scotch.

The most popular theory is that MacReady was still human and Childs was infected. The alien is uncovered after being frozen so when a stalemate is a reached why would the Thing not simply wait to be frozen and try again. But why would Childs not attack MacReady if MacReady wasn’t also infected? This brings us to the Double Trouble theory.

Childs was infected by Blair and MacReady was infected sometime after the blood sample test. Since they are both infected that is why they do not attack each other. The third possibility is that only MacReady was infected at the end and he was infecting Childs by sharing the bottle with Childs. Remember, never share bottles during an alien attack.


4. What Was Whispered to Mademoiselle by Anna? (Martyrs 2008)

Martyrs is about a underground organization that spends a lot of money trying to understand what happens in the afterlife by kidnapping and torturing people until they are on the verge of death in the hopes that they will become martyrs. The film follows a young woman named Anna who in the second half of the film is captured by this organization, tortured and eventually becomes a martyr. The leader of this organization referred to as Mademoiselle speaks to Anna to learn what happens after you die. In the next scene Mademoiselle informs one of the members of the organization that what Anna told her was clear and precise and that he should “keep doubting”. She then places a gun in her mouth and commits suicide.

Similarly to The Thing the end of Martyrs leaves us with clues but no decisive information. Martyrs leaves the audience with a very real death but why? What did Anna say that inspired such dramatic action?

Mademoiselle’s phrase “keep doubting” is an interesting clue. It can be taken to mean that there are other doubters in the organization and they must discover the “truth” for themselves. My favourite take on the ending is that Anna lied to Mademoiselle intentionally. Mademoiselle’s punishment for doing these horrible things to Anna was that she was told there was no afterlife and rather than have failed her followers she kills herself. Mademoiselle’s evil means will justify her end.


5. How Did Marie Kill Everyone in High Tension?

This is one of the great horror mysteries. How could one French chick be in two places at once and murder an entire family? This may be one of the most famous plot holes in recent memory as (to paraphrase Roger Ebert) they literally drive a truck through it.

High Tension aka Haute Tension aka Switchblade Romance could have easily been one of the great horror films of the early aughts but they got greedy. I would have preferred it to be a straight-forward slahsher film rather than a bloody, non-nonsensical, psychological thriller. When the ending is revealed that Marie killed all of Alex’s family I was no longer scared or engaged. It was as though I could see Alexandre Aja giving me the finger.

The easiest answer lies in the opening scenes of the film when we see a woman in a psychiatric hospital being put through hell. If we then take this to mean we are witnessing the events of the film through her eyes this means we are at the mercy of a deeply unreliable narrator. Or a lazy writer/director. I’m all for lulling the audience into a false sense of security only to pull the rug out from under them in the final moments. It’s a great storytelling device. However, it makes no sense to add elements that are clearly impossible to the plot if it is impossible for Marie to be in two places at once.

So the basic answer to this is that what High Tension consists of is Marie’s version of events which fits in with the first line of the film “Are they recording?” However, it is a silly ending that doesn’t hold water or illuminate any themes or tropes. It’s exploitation at its worst.


6. Why Did Regan React To Tap Water? (The Exorcist)

Part of the demon’s modus operandi in The Exorcist was to engage with Father Merrin (Max Von Sydow). In one of the early exorcism scenes Father Karras (Jason Miller) throws tap water at Regan (Linda Blair) saying it is holy water. The demon reacts in pain then Karras tells it that it was plain tap water implying Regan is not possessed and it’s a mental health issue.

This reaction could be taken two ways. The demon wanted to interact with Father Karras and thought if it reacted to things like Holy Water Karras would be convinced of the possession. Conversely, the demon could have been playing along as its real fight was with Father Merrin. The demon, wishing to get rid of Karras faked the reaction in order to speed up the process of getting Father Merrin involved. Demons, they know what they want as much as women do.


7. Who Was The Killer in Black Christmas? (Black Christmas 1974)

Black Christmas is the original (and in my opinion best) teen slasher film. I could write for days about how dark, creepy and intelligent this film is. One of the best things about Black Christmas is that we are never outright told who the killer is. Before it was popular to have an iconic villain that would slice and dice his way through sequels this Canadian slasher left an open ending.

The Final Girl Jess (Olivia Hussey) suspects her boyfriend Peter (Keir) is the killer as his behavior becomes increasingly erratic and aggressive. Throughout the film, however, the audience is privy to an intruder who breaks into the sorority house and spies on the girls. It is suggested that this is an escaped mental patient who is also calling the house with obscene phone calls. Could the intruder be Peter? Or is Peter just an extrovert music student? The God-awful 2006 remake spends the majority of the film building up the back story of the intruder and establishing him as the killer. The uncertainty in the original adds to the fear while not taking away from the plot or themes.

At the end of the film we hear noises and whispering from the attic implying that there was an intruder was the killer or perhaps just biding his time.

Did you know John Carpenter's Halloween was first concieved by director Bob Clark as a sequel to Black Christmas?


8. Why Was Miss Collins Laughing At Carrie? (Carrie 1977)

Carrie should be required viewing by every teenager, nay, human being. Carrie White (Sissy Spacek) is a lonely high school outcast raised by an overly religious abusive single mother. She is tormented at school and at home. Her luck seems to turn when a popular boy asks her to the prom and she gains confidence to finally stand up to her mother. Of course this all goes horribly wrong when Carrie falls victim to a prank played by the evil Chris (Nancy Allen) and has pig’s blood dumped on her as she is crowned Prom Queen. She then harnesses her telekinetic abilities and kills everyone at the prom. Naturally.

The most heart breaking part of Carrie is that she actually seems to be gaining acceptance from her classmates. After the blood is dumped on her there is a shocked silence and everyone begins to laugh at her including Miss Collins (Betty Buckley) who up until that point had been her biggest supporter. Why would Miss Collins laugh at Carrie? Why didn’t she help the poor girl? Why didn’t she give Chris another amazing bitch-slap? Director Brian DePalma addresses this very question in the DVD Special Features, “Was Miss Collins laughing at Carrie in the scene?’ and the answer is no, not at all. A good deal of that sequence is really in Carrie’s mind, which tips over at the point of the blood. What is occurring is a mixture of what her mother has threatened and promised will indeed happen, her worst fears, her imagination, her paranoia, and everything else.”

In the “real world” of Carrie this means that the actual reactions from the crowd are those that happen in the slow motion sequence after the blood is spilt. The laughter is fully imagined from the seed placed by her mother’s warning “they’re all going to laugh at you.”

Judy Greer, Fern Mayo from Jawbreaker will play Miss Desjardin (The original name of Miss Collins in the novel) in the 2013 version of Carrie.


9. What’s Up With The Guy In The Dog Costume? (The Shining 1980)

This is one of the most often asked questions with a very concrete answer. As a terrorized Wendy (Shelley Duvall) runs through the Outlook Hotel in hopes of saving herself and her son she sees a man in a dog costume fellating a man in a tuxedo. We never see them again nor are they ever mentioned.

This is a small storyline in the novel The Shining. While Jack is reliving a masque ball that happened in the 1920s at the Overlook he sees a man in a dog costume chasing after Horace Derwent a wealthy Howard Hughes like figure. The man in the dog costume is Derwent’s former lover who is trying to get him back. Kubrick chose to include a flash of this scene but never explain it. It is another layer and story that exists solely in the Overlook Hotel.


10. How Did Malcolm Not Know He Was Dead? (The Sixth Sense 1999)

For real. How? The closest explanation I can get is that Malcolm was a jerk. Throughout the rest of the film the ghosts we see are continuously reliving their deaths, whereas Malcolm seems perfectly content helping Cole. This obviously includes other questions such as, who hired him? How is he getting paid? How does he keep winding up sitting silently at tables with lonely women?

The excuses given in the film mainly consist of the fact that he had been neglecting his marriage. To be honest, if sitting in silence at the dinner table didn’t tip him off that he was dead, he would have eventually died alone.

What's more creepier is an adult Haley Joel Oment