ONTD

I'm the same but with the opposite parents.. yet I still get freaked out about my dad dying, even though I haven't lived with him in over 7 years and I only see him once or twice a year, really. It still scares me.

I've lost both of my Grandfathers when I was younger, and I'm terrified of losing my grandmothers. One of them is 76 but she has heart problems and stuff which worries me, and the other is in generally pretty good health but she's 84 (the same age as Stevie's mom :/) and I know realistically that eventually she'll just get too old.

:(

Oh no. I'm so sorry. I don't know of any site but I am sure that there are things like that that exist, maybe another member who has (unfortunately) gone through something similar will know.

Stay strong.

Oh no. :(

IAW^. Wholeheartedly. And, as an organic thing, tell him you love him. A lot. If you mean it when you say it, it will comfort you later.

"I'm kind of falling apart."

Although there are people who are not affected by this kind of thing, in general I think there's no way not to fall apart. I'm really sorry for what you're going through.

I'd say, from here on in, cut yourself a huge amount of slack, know that what you're dealing with is really unfortunate and unfair, and you will be dealing with this for the rest of your life, and do what you need to do to keep together, both while he's alive and after he passes. Do everything you need to do now. I didn't think about how I'd feel years down the road so I didn't do all of that. Make videos of your dad (if he's still in an okay physical state to remember him this way) and take pictures (same), talk a lot, tell him you love him, tell him anything you need to tell him, hear what you need to hear. Get involved with fundraising or volunteering for cancer. Volunteering with young kids whose parents have cancer helps keep things in perspective a little.

Lots of people won't understand what you're going through, and even between your parents and all those in the generations above you, there will be huge discrepancies between how people interpret and remember and feel about things (because losing a parent is a lot different than losing a son, a husband, a brother).

Don't ever leave therapy, especially not when there is a time in the future when you feel "good." Make sure you are seeing the best person for you. If it's not effective, it's the relationship, not therapy, so keep finding the right person. Therapy is a great way to deal with this loss, for years to come.

Hope that helped just a little.

do it bb

it's always the right time to listen to landslide

Yes, Stevie dumped Lindsey. But they continued to be on/off throughout the late 70's for sure, and perhaps even after that. Their whole dating timeline is completely blurred, even when it initially started.

She's never accused him of abusive to her in their relationship, although she has said things along the lines of him being scary when he got mad etc. Regarding their famous Rumours breakup, it's basically always been told as something along the lines of, Stevie not wanting to be tied down so much and moving away from Lindsey, this upsetting Lindsey and causing strain etc, culminating with Stevie breaking it off. They always seem to throw in that it was just too hard to be so famous and in that relationship - along with it being hard to be with the person all day long and perhaps being frustrated with them on a professional level at times and not having an outlet for that frustration because they had to come home and sleep in the same bed.

That said, before their big break-up they were supposedly always tumultuous (Stevie's told stories of leaving town and seeing other guys, then coming back to Lindsey, and Lindsey had left Stevie in Colorado and went back to LA without her, etc) so I think neither one of them necessarily thought that breakup was permanent until they each started dating other people and then after that their timing was never right.

Now I'm just rambling.

Basically: Yes. Perhaps, but it's never been outright slated that way. You should read the book - it's interesting and fun to read, although you have to keep in mind that everything she says is rose-colored.

Her mom definitely had an amazing run, you're right, and she certainly had a lot to be proud of. It doesn't make it any less heartbreaking, though, for a child to lose their parent. Stevie also already lost her father, and she doesn't have a family of her own, and it's right around the holidays, which just makes it worse. Thankfully Stevie has a great support system of friends and a brother and extended family who I'm sure will be there for her during this time.

I think the reactions in this post just further emphasize how tough it is to lose a parent at ANY age - so tough that it's inconceivable to most people, although we all know it is inevitable at some point.


Edited at 2011-12-31 01:05 am (UTC)