BBFINE KEEPS HIS BODY VICIOUS BECAUSE LAQUEENTO HATES FATTIES



THE SELENA OF VAGINAS Chris Pine runs back to his car after a long work-out at the gym on Thursday afternoon (May 13) in Los Angeles. (I CAN THINK OF A FEW LONG WORK OUTS FOR HIM...)

The 29-year-old actor stud is trying to bulk up as he was seen downing a bottle of muscle-growing shake ABB Extreme Body RTD 50, which has 50 grams of protein and 26 vitamins and essential minerals (....YEAH, I JUST WANNA SAY THAT I HAD POPCORN AND BEER FOR DINNER, SO...WE ARE CLEARLY BOTH FITNESS MINDED INDIVIDUALS AND HE SHOULD PROBABLY PUT HIS P IN MY V NOW.)






OH KITTENS. I WAS FEELING A BIT LISTLESS TODAY AND WHAT DO I SEE WHEN I FINALLY GET AROUND TO CHECKING MY E-MAIL? BBFINE WENT ON A RUN TO CHEER ME UP (OBVIOUSLY. TELL ME OTHERWISE. I DARE YOU. I'M DRINKING AND SURLY.) AND THE DEAREST davyjonesing LINKED ME TO THE PICTURES! THEY ARE BOTH SO SELFLESS. CLEARLY I SHOULD HAVE SEX WITH ONE OF THEM. I NOMINATE BBFINE. NO OFFENSE, davyjonesing OH WELL. ARE Y'ALL READY FOR SOME MOTHERFUCKING ARM PORN?!?!?!




HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG



AND HIS HAIR, KITTENS! LOOK HOW FABULOUS AND SCRUNCHY IT LOOKS! I BET HE USES PANTENE. OR GARNIER. WHATEVER LAQUEENTO BUYS HIM (YOU KNOW THIS SLOPPY BITCH ISN'T IN CHARGE OF HIS OWN HAIRCARE....HOT SLOPPY BITCH THOUGH HE IS. EW, NOW I'M THINKING OF SLOPPY JOES. OH GOD. LET'S MOVE ON.)



GUH, HE'S ALL ~WORKED UP~ AND PROBABLY SMELLS LIKE SWEAT AND MASCULINITY AND...AND... OK, I NEED TO STOP BECAUSE I AM GIVING MY LADYPARTS A SEXUAL MIGRANE THINKING ABOUT IT....I MEAN IDK HOW LAQUEENTO SAYS SO QUIET ON THE SUBJECT BECAUSE IF I WERE TAPPING THAT? (CAUSE HE IS. I MEAN. HE JUST IS.) I WOULD MAKE FUCKING T-SHIRTS ADVERTISING IT. I'D GET THAT SHIT TATTOOED ON MY FOREHEAD CAUSE OH, I'M SORRY, FACIAL TATTOOS ARE TACKY AND I WON'T EVER BE ABLE TO GET ANOTHER JOB? FUCK YOU, I HAVE SEEN AND TOUCHED CHRIS PINE'S DICK. YOU ARE INVALID.



I MEAN THIS DUDE IS CLEARLY THE KIND OF DUDE WHERE YOU DON'T EVEN CARE IF YOU GET OFF WHEN YOU FUCK HIM, YOU ARE JUST SO HAPPY TO BE FUCKING HIM THAT WHEN YOU ARE DONE YOU RUN OFF AND BECOME A NUN BECAUSE YOU FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE TO SPEND THE REST OF YOUR LIFE THANKING JESUS FOR THE EXPERIENCE. DO YOU THINK HE CAN LEGALLY CHANGE HIS NAME TO CAPTAIN HOT FUCK? IT WOULD NOT BE A LIE...

(I'M TRYING TO SAY NICE THINGS BECAUSE I HAVE A GAY PERSONAL TRAINER LOOKING AT THESE PICTURES OVER MY SHOULDER RANTING ABOUT HOW BBFINE NEEDS TO WORK ON HIS LEGS MORE AND HE HATES IT WHEN GUYS CLEARLY SPEND ALL THEIR TIME ON THEIR TORSO AND OH MY GOD, SHUT UP BEST FRIEND YOU ARE KILLING ME)



BESTIE:"HE NEEDS A FUCKING TAN. LIKE, OH HI, CASPER THE FRIENDLY GHOST OVER HERE. OH MY GOD DON'T PUT THAT IN. THAT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY, IT'S JUST TRUE. HE DOES NEED A TAN! LOOK AT HIM! LOOK--YOU KNOW WHAT, FUCK IT, I'M GETTING A BEER. IF HE'S NAKED IN ANY OF THESE PICTURES CALL ME OVER."



I SAVED THIS ONE FOR LAST BECAUSE THAT. ASS. THOSE. ARMS. EVEN HIS LEGS LOOK NICE AND HOLY FUCK I WANT TO BITE ALL HIS SOFT PLACES AND NOW I AM BEING TOLD THAT IS FOUL BY A GAY MAN WITH A JOCK STRAP FETISH. ...UMMM THIS POST IS DONE.




SOURCE IS SLIGHTLY DRUNK FORGIVE ME IF I'VE RAMBLED
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