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swarley213

11:11 pm - 09/09/2009

John Mayer addressed rumours like a gentleman

John Mayer KISS MIA/Tattoo prOn Pictures, Images and Photos

Mayer decides to get Sinatra smooth when he addresses rumours:
Via his twitter:

"I'm sure she's a wonderful gal but we have never tasted the Skittles Rainbow together."

More goodness behind the cut

"Rumor control: How do I put this like a gentleman...I have never high fived Kristin Cavalari with my penis."

"My Milli has never slam danced with her Vanilli." (My personal favorite)

"I have never Bensoned her Hedges, nor have I attempted to Bartle her James."

I think it's hilarious. More fun then 'It's bullshit.'

Source

Any spelling errors are his.

TAGGED:
john mayer

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Leave a Comment

rampant_geekery 10th-Sep-2009 06:03 am (UTC)

I want to hate him, but goddamn his Twitters are so funny I can't.

initialc 10th-Sep-2009 07:41 am (UTC)

Exactly. He makes twitter lighthearted when there's just so many people passing it off as a news source.

mindofthebeheld 10th-Sep-2009 01:57 pm (UTC)

lol same. No wonder he gets so much ass.

soooxfetch 10th-Sep-2009 06:03 am (UTC)

his twitter is making me fall in love with him.

ohhkathleen 10th-Sep-2009 08:16 am (UTC)

It's hard to view him as a douche when he is so funny. He did some special somewhere, idk I don't remember, but he was funny as hell.

tammyinlalaland 10th-Sep-2009 12:31 pm (UTC)

I think that is why people thought he was a douchbag. They missed he was joking

laureanimation 10th-Sep-2009 03:51 pm (UTC)

"John Mayer has a TV show?"

Made me fall in love with his silly humor while he was putting out crap like "Daughters" ...that says a lot, because that is a horrible song.

truelyesoteric 10th-Sep-2009 06:57 pm (UTC)

Did you ever see the time he dressed up as a bear during his own concert and went around with some dude saying he was John Mayer and nobody believed him? It was so very awesome.

He's an ass, but I can't seem to hate him.

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angeleyesjg24 10th-Sep-2009 06:04 am (UTC)

HA! That is why I love him.

satirists 10th-Sep-2009 06:04 am (UTC)

John Mayer is the definition of a classy gentleman. So dapper.

meganlovesjared 10th-Sep-2009 06:05 am (UTC)

"My Milli has never slam danced with her Vanilli."

LMFAO.
I'm going to use this IRL. xD

elsienita 10th-Sep-2009 06:05 am (UTC)

"Rumor control: How do I put this like a gentleman...I have never high fived Kristin Cavalari with my penis."

ngl, i laughed pretty hard when i saw this on twitter

ashe_frost 10th-Sep-2009 06:05 am (UTC)

He is such an epic douche that it's starting to look good on him.

tankxgrrl 10th-Sep-2009 06:06 am (UTC)

what the hale is he wearing..

il0veyou4 10th-Sep-2009 06:30 am (UTC)

sex

chrislola 10th-Sep-2009 07:20 am (UTC)

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mastahofunnines 10th-Sep-2009 06:06 am (UTC)

hahahaha high fived her with his penis
chortle chortle
FUCKING ORGANIC CHEMISTRY WHY THE FUCK WON'T YOU MAKE SENSE MY LIFE WOULD BE SO MUCH GODDAMNED EASIER IF I COULD JUST MOVE ONE DAMN PAIR OF ELECTRONS TO THE OTHER SIDE OF THIS DAMN LEWIS STRUCTURE, BUT NOOOOOOOOOOOO I CAN'T
YOU AND ME, WE'RE FUCKING DONE PROFESSIONALLY.
too bad i have to endure a whole year of it.

anti_krypton 10th-Sep-2009 06:09 am (UTC)

UGH. O-chem is the fucking WORST. I barely passed with a C. Good luck bb!

mastahofunnines 10th-Sep-2009 06:14 am (UTC)

thanks bb! and uggggh i need to get a b in this class, i'm planning on doing something health related and uhh...your grades need to be decent for that. and mine...are not. D:

iheartchem 10th-Sep-2009 06:15 am (UTC)

Is it all memorization, basically?
Is math a large part of it?
*1st year student*

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wtfunks 10th-Sep-2009 06:58 am (UTC)

i've heard so many horror stories about o-chem. thank gawd i don't have to take it.

hproxmysox 10th-Sep-2009 06:34 am (UTC)

Ugh, I'm taking that this quarter but we haven't started school yet. I'M SO SCAREDDDD

kitina 10th-Sep-2009 04:07 pm (UTC)

i HAETEHATEHATEHATE OCHEM!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm taking it again because i didn't do so well the first time :(

lestat +11 to you, mr. mayer. :D — 10th-Sep-2009 06:06 am (UTC)

starbucks_patch Re: +11 to you, mr. mayer. :D — 10th-Sep-2009 06:10 am (UTC)

your icon is fabulous, dahling.

lestat Re: +11 to you, mr. mayer. :D — 10th-Sep-2009 06:13 am (UTC)

Ty! C:

beccahwho 10th-Sep-2009 06:09 am (UTC)

i forget he has sleeves

swarley213 10th-Sep-2009 06:15 am (UTC)

Me too. I'm a big tattoo enthusiast, and I have always thought that his sleeve didn't really suit him, but then again I don't know him. I guess he was trying to change the public's perception of him too, but it was a trip to see the clean cut kid from CT with a buzz hair cut and a tattoo sleeve walking around flipping cameras off. It was right around the time (summer after the winter, I think) that he revealed himself to be a stoner and that he kept a xanax in his pocket.

The pill pocket joke from back in the day made sense suddenly.

I still adore him, he may be a crazy bastard but damn he can play guitar.